Dont mind the defensiveness Purdy as it comes with the territory of having PTSD. We all spout off at the mouth sometimes the minute someone says something that hits us the wrong way. You dont have anything to feel sorry about. You have the right to vent just the same as everyone else does. Just because you're not venting about something somebody else wants to hear doesnt give you any less of a right.

Everyone else, please try to understand that Purdy is mearly expressing frustrations he/she is feeling, the same way we all do. The frustrations are just a little diferent because they stem from a diferent situation.

I do have a family and I cant tell you I know how you feel. But I worked in a group home for at risk teens. The most heartbreaking thing I have ever had to see is a 14 year old girl break down in tears, knowing that there is no one that cares she is hurting. She was molested by her mother and mothers boyfriends as a small child, and was taken away by the age of 5. and in the next 9 years she had 18 different placements. From foster homes, to group homes, to detention centers, to mental hospitals and all over again. The worst is when she would have no where to go and they weould put her in a mental hospital or a detention center just because it was the only place with a bed. An 8 year old girl does not belong in a detention center simply because it is the only available bed. She was made fun of cause she was overweight. She had many personality disorders and almost no appropriate social skills. She was sexualy active and doing drugs whenever given the chance. She ran away many times. She was raped. Molested and starved in one foster home. She was even threatened sexualy by one of the police officers who picked her up. Afraid no one would believe her, she kept silent for months until the officer showed up at the house one day for another client, and she about lost it. During all this, she had no one to turn to. Not a friend, not a boyfriend, not a preacher, not a mother, father, grandparent, aunt, uncle, brother, sister, or even a diecent foster parent.

So to watch this girl sit on her bed and break down in tears because the one person she thought was her friend called her a name, was absolutely dreadful. It wasnt about being called a name. When you have never felt love, its not about whats going on around you. Its about feeling that you have never been good enough to be loved. You cant "look on the bright side" when there has never been a bright side. You cant "suck it up" cause your too pissed off. You cant empathize with others because you have never experienced it yourself. Quite frankly it makes a person very lonely, and very bitter. My heart truely goes out to you, because I know what I saw in that young girls eyes was emptiness and hurt and there was nothing I could do to fix it. No drugs on the planet replace the basic human need for affection. I cant feel your pain. But I know what I felt that day sitting in that poor girls room. Im sorry that you have had to live your life void of love and affection, and Im also sorry that you did not a get a warmer welcome. I hope it does not deter you from coming back. Either way. You can send me a private email anytime.