I know this sounds suspicious but I really am asking on behalf of a friend of mine.

She has been with her husband for 10 years. He is very devoted, gorgeous guy. They have always appeared very much in love.

Lately she has mentioned things that I kind of wonder about.

Comments like;

- sometimes his a bit controlling
- his "Himself" 90% of the time but there is this other 10%, like a Jekyll & Hyde
- he admits he sometimes has a problem with anger
- he has thrown things at me, but in ten years it's only happened like 3 times and he didn't mean to throw it at me (and on questioning further) he didn't aim it at me
- sometimes when holding me or mucking around he hurts me, I ask him to let go but he holds on that bit longer and sometimes I have to ask again before he will let go
- when we argue he calls me a "F**king idiot"
- he can be very critical, tells me what to do all the time, belittles me
- his never hit me or anything but sometimes his anger is a bit intimidating
- if I don't do what he asks sometimes he jokes that he will find someone else
- sometimes doesn't want to hear about my emotional problems

What do you all think of this? These are the comments I've heard over the past two years. He is a lovely guy, not just my opinion but widespread. Even she says his great; helps with the housework, always telling her he loves her, affectionate, gentle. Seems respectful of women.

She has had depression, and can be a pretty neurotic, anxious type.

I'm reluctant to get involved but curious as I'm not sure what my opinion is on this, and whether I'm being triggered by 'normal' couple stuff or not.

Like I said it's only the odd comment now and again, mostly the seem the 'perfect' couple. Am I being paranoid or is there reason for concern here?