Oh, OUCH!

How can I put this in a public forum? I will try to phrase it carefully, I guess!

I once dated a guy for a short while, long, long ago. He was into push-pull relationships, drawing me in, then distance and then trying to draw me in again. I was more naive back then. I asked a girl friend for her thoughts. She said he wanted a "F*** buddy." I'd never heard the term before. But what he wanted was someone who would be there for him when he had sexual desires, romantic desires, etc. and who would go away and leave him alone the rest of the time. Ah-ha! And that fit my BF's behavior to a T. She was right on target. I moved on, not wanting to have such a relationship and figuring he needed someone who would not get emotionally involved.

Don't expect the BF, or ex-BF as the case may be, to understand that you have emotional needs that are not filled by being alternately pushed away and drawn in. He will not understand your emotional needs, as yours are very different from his own.

You deserve someone who will love you and care for you, not someone who plays you when it suits his needs. Possibly you can eventually just be friends. But before that can happen, the emotional wounds have to heal. Perhaps it would be healthier for you if you take a break from contact for a time, until you don't hurt?

Anyhow, that is my read on it.

Best wishes to you!

Cowgirl