Thank you everyone for your posts! It helps. I guess this is something I need to keep working on.

What's been helping me lately is bringing up the memory of the traumatic events that caused the change, and thinking of the person who was the aggressor. He pretended to be someone he's not when I had first met him, but now when I remember these events I remind myself of who he really is. Aggressive, manipulative, decietful, abusive to his subordinates, insecure/political, arogant, and utterly devoid of empathy for anyone. He has been identified as a psychopath by my therapist, and as "evil" and "psycho" by himself.

Then I think of people I have liked and loved who have done right by me, and their acts of affection, loyalty, and kindness. I tell myself that this person is not a psychopath, that this is a good person.

So on an emotional/relationship level, humanity is no longer painted one color but many. All different types of people with different colors and levels of good and awful. This is probably something I should have learned as a developing child, but I perhaps I blinded myself to certain things as a defense and a means to survive.