Unbroken, I am addressing the post concerning you feeling cornered and her percpetion over the event you outlined!

It amazes me again that your relationship is so similar to my last!

Okay! I too in the past had the tendency to see things rather differently from my partner. I guess that this is inevitable in realtionships. However, in retrospcect and with much hindsight I now realise that much of what I THOUGHT, HEARD AND FELT were greatly influenced by my past and the symptoms of PTSD.

95 percent of the time I would only hear the negative aspect of a sitaution concerning our communications. I would feel under attack, wonder if I was being manipulated and often felt that he was not being truthful with me or communicating effectivley - ha ha talk about transference!

It would cause him much, much frustration and he would spend time trying to help me understand what it was that he was actually saying to me. I would see the truth of this eventually after a long while thinking and pondering, but I would still wonder if he was manipulating me to see things his way. A very difficult vicious circle.

I would strongly suggest that YOU DO TELL HER EXACYL HOW YOU FEEL! My lovely did not, and over time he just shut down! He felt he couild no longer weather the storm.

It is so difficult unbroken and my major healing breakthrough; coming out of denial and really wanting to heal was probably as a driect result of that relationship (bittersweet). My lovely showed me a reflection of me I did not like! I realised I was so wrong about a lot of our issues due to my faulty rationale.

It will take much work to undo the crossed wires and skewed thinking. She has to trust in herself and you! She is doing it most of the time without realising what she is doing - she has learned to protect herself this way!

Please try to be honest with her. You must do it for you and her. You must have your own boundaries and she needs to learn what they are.

Spirit x