Cr*p! I just got the thought I was trying to communicate!

Sympathy is difficult when we have suffered trauma that makes us feel, guilty, causes us to question whether we are responsible for what happened, causes us to dislike ourselves, causes us to shun help, causes us to feel all of the dysfunctional things we can have and do!

Why is sympathy Okay for losing someone (death and grieiving), but not Okay for grieving over past events that have facilitated our struggles?

I am not saying I agree with giving sympathy by itself - I am just asking why we feel it is appropriate in some situations and not in others'. I get the whole tough love stuff! But why do we as sufferes have such a bad time with that word?

I think it is a mixture of what I already outlined and also what our trauma(s) are and were.

Spirit x