I hear you Sisu. I would have stayed with mine too. But, he pushed so very hard, was manipulative and self destructive. He really gave me no choice.

My "friend" definitely needed to do his healing on his own. And he is. He's in there every week working on stuff. So, I feel more positive about having let him go and see what will come through further down the road. Maybe nothing. I feel ok with that now.

I believe these people that we love are just doing the best they can.

I don't feel like I was co-dependent or needy when I entered the relationship. I was just someone who fell in love with a great guy. Everything went totally haywire with the therapy. I turned into a nutcase as well cause I had no understanding. But, now things feel ok. I know to just let him be to do whatever it is he needs to do.

I saw a tiny light recently. After a 7 month shut down- that began soon after the therapy started - he chose to see me recently. I'm not exactly sitting at home waiting for him to " choose to see me". And he's not exactly my deam guy right now. But, I am glad to see some progress and movement in his attiute towards me and himself. He didn't run away. He had positive things to say. He felt close to what I used to know. Perhaps this is what recovery starts to look like? I don't know.


I will always believe that he is a great guy despite all the shitty coping mechanisms.The ones that shut him down.

Something wonderful that has resulted is a really simple feeling of caring about someone no matter what. It is unconditional. All I want is for him to heal because he did not deserve any of what happened.