No Nic, I don't mind. It's actually comforting to know others feel the same.

As well as longing for a mother figure to rescue me, comfort & nurture me, I also apparently 'enable others dependancy'. I'm much better in that regard now, but still this fantasy persists.

I've been completely open with my therapist about it. We've dug & dug. We've explored the mother issues, self worth, empowerment, responsibility, transference. Still doesn't go away.

To be honest, I've researched this for so long and yet to come up with a real way to get over it or past it or why. No one can really tell me why I'm doing it or how to alleviate it. It's I guess a mix of all things I've discussed with my therapist.

It's quite natural to long to be rescued after a trauma. My therapist likens it to a small child who falls over & scrapes her knee. Very natural for that child to run to Mummy seeking comfort & reassurance that she is okay before going back to play.

But with me I'm no longer a child, my knee has long since healed, yet I'm stuck in waiting for Mum to come & get me, and so cannot get on with going back out to play.

It's a big stumbling block for me, and I seem to be unable to get past it, around it, through it.