Hi, I'm a new member here. I have had PTSD since childhood and am now in my early 40's. I grew up in a very chaotic enviornment filled with drug/alcohol abuse, physical illness and domestic violence. I was the youngest child in the family with a several years distance between me and my siblings. This made me vulnerable to allot of different kinds of abuse and neglect.

Dispite all of that I've been a "successful" person on the outside. Even when I was married to my very abusive first husband, I was able to fool allot of people When I finally fled that marriage with our child, I believe i escaped with my life by the skin of my teeth

The reason I'm here is because I can't function anymore. I'm fearful all of the time. I carry around this smoldering anger towards the people who hurt me. I am easily triggered by other people so I do all I can to avoid any contact with other people aside from talking about the weather. I am remarried and have a wonderful husband and child who are very supportive. I desperately want to resolve this stuff for myself and for them.

I have been in regular counseling for over 5 years and take some medication. Both have been helpful but i'm still probably only 50% of the person I could be.

Thanks for listening