Hi wolfalohalani,

I have done a fair bit of meditation. One of the things I have had to understand is that meditation does not mix well with some things! Lately I am pretty convinced that the 'inventors' and most of the traditional teachers of meditation likely did/do not have a history of trauma!

As for flashbacks, I think that mindfulness meditation can be a wonderful tool for becoming more aware of what triggers things, slowing down the triggering process so to speak. Allowing one to connect the dots. Almost like you can see or feel it coming.

But as for 'turning towards' the experience, the best I could suggest would be 'touch and go', if you know what that means? Forcing myself to remain with any experience which is becoming overwhelming is not a kindness to myself, and is definitely not the point of any type of meditation practice.

I know in my meditation practice I used to be really hard on myself. Like everything else, it became infected with the attitudes toward myself which resulted from my upbringing. It became a tool for me to inflict pain on myself.

Be kind to yourself in this and in all things!