I would have packed up and left him before the paint dried. I grew up in a house of weekly violence, as well as the constant threat of violence and I swore to myself at a young age that when I got free from that life, that no man (or woman) would ever raise his hand to me again, and live to see the sun rise again. I promised to go to jail for murder rather than live in fear and oppression.

Now that I am older, I had several boyfriends and one fiancee with a temper, and who hit walls in anger. They were doing that to see how far they could get away with. I don't play that game. My a$$ was out of the relationship before his hand bruises began to form. I won't plan a murder like I did as a child, instead, I leave completely.

He has lost respect for you. He wants to control you. My father had this cycle where he would beat the consciousness out of all of us, then say that WE made him do it. Even if your man says he's sorry, the cycle of violence and apology/ blame will repeat. Do you want to live that way? I guarantee you that he will do it again.

I have PTSD from multiple sources, but that does not give me license to hit my husband, or anyone. I am still responsible for my actions. PTSD is no excuse to abuse my spouse.

He is hitting the wall now, but in a few months, he will hit you. If you don't leave then, he will put you in the hospital or the morgue, it's only a matter of time. I am just being honest. Get out now.