Thread: What Should Be Considered "Self-Destructive"?
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Old 23-04-2008, 01:09 PM
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becvan becvan is offline Gender Female
 
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Location: T. Bay, Ontario Canada
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So, let me recap what I know really quick here. In the pregnancy and ptsd thread you said that you have issues with the gyno and issues with general touch. You are single. Sounds like your planing on being a single mom. You have yet to heal your trauma as your still in the process of healing. That about right?

My thoughts are your only thinking of yourself. A child deserves two parents. On top of deserving that, it's also been proven over and over that a child with two involved parents does much better than one. You want to start off with your child being at a disadvantage. How unfair is that? Single parenting is NOT easy.

Secondly, you have issues with touch and the gyno. So all the necessary exams would be out then? So taking care of your child s health while pregnant just fell into second place didn't it? Also children need love and touch and lot's of it. Ask any of us with children just how rough that can be... Ask our children how it feels to have a parent with touch issues. Watch their self-esteem go down the drain.

Thirdly, your still healing. So on top of the single parent disadvantage, you want to toss a child in with not-yet managed PTSD. I am a single mom with PTSD and let me tell you I didn't do my children any favors. They have had a hard life because of me. Honestly, If I knew back then what I know now, I would not have brought my children into this mess.

Under all these circumstances, I agree with your doc. Your not only being self-destructive but selfish in not thinking about what this future child really needs. Sorry to be so blunt, but I think you need to hear this because you keep asking us.

You have plenty of time to have children. I think your obsessing over this. Get yourself on track and meet and fall in love with a nice man first.

Also, why did you go off the pill? Are you going to tell the man you sleep with that your aren't on the pill because you want to get pregnant? Anything less is unfair, wrong and exceptionally... well selfish on top of removing a man's choice. And they do have a right to this choice.

bec
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