Hi my name is Karen Williams; I, myself, have PTSD. I was the victim of Sadistic Sexual Abuse as a child. I think this abuse qualifies as Sadistic because I was bound by chains and my breasts were also bound with bandaging tape to restrict breathing. The man also urinated on me at one point. I'm having a very difficult time healing from this because a lot of the details are lost to me. I suffered amnesia of the event for many years and still have not recovered all of it. My mind holds the information as to who he was, where we were, when..and so on.., but I do know it happened and I've been in Therapy on and off for quite some time. I also have Borderline Personality Disorder, which has been hiding under the PTSD for most of my life. It's a new diagnosis and a scary one at that. I'm not sure what to do anymore. I'm worn down to almost nothing, like dirt. That's what it feels like anyway. It's sad, cuz I'm only nineteen and I feel like I'm ninety. At least there are others out there like me. If you read this, and have had similar experiences, I would love the support. No obligations, of course.