Hi there,

I'm looking for help. I have had PTSD for 7 years due to domestic violence and in particular a break in and knife attack, but i think the rest of the abuse has affected me too. I was diagnosed in 2005.

I have three children. I have been sleeping (or not) downstairs on the sofa for 7 years. Every sound i hear could be him. It is pure torture.

I was cured in august 2005 with rewind therapy. At the time i felt clear headed and i thought a miracle had just happened. I was actually sleeping upstairs in my bed. I went back to my studies and achived a 1st for that semester.

Then 3 months later the man in question (who was my lawyer for my divorce - and is still a lawyer even after a criminal conviction for violence against me) sent me threatening e-mails (my ex-husband gave him my address). The PTSD has been back ever since. My studies are basically down the drain. I am being constantly triggered because i have to see this man in court (contact order for my daughter) and give discriptions of what happened and he is just as verbally abusive towards me. The judge said I had no backbone -which was unhelpful to say the least - he obviously doesn't properly understand PTSD. I feel like jelly and not of this world, in denial during the court appearances and want to die in the days following court appearances. This just isn't the normal me. I was so capable before. Somewhere i still cling onto the old me.

I desperately need to find an Expert in PSTD in England in order to help me with all this. I feel i won't survive the next court session otherwise. My children are the most wonderful children, happy and sweet lovely beings. All effort i do have is to ensure they are doing ok. They don't deserve to loose their mum to PTSD.