Well initially I couldn't believe the responses I was getting here, felt slighted, pissed off and like whose side are you all on anyway.

But I'm over that now and thanks for all your posts.

However. Still suffering from the session. I don't feel up to typing much about it at this stage but I might later.

Good news. Saw a wonderful GP for the first time. Totally got it. Honestly, I was at the point where if she hadn't got it, or just thrown an AD prescription at me, I don't know what I would of done. All I can say is that I did not see beyond that appointment. (Interesting fact for those in Australia, there are some GP's that can do additional training in mental health which this one did and what a difference it makes. Found them on the beyond blue website).

I'm seeing the GP again in 3 weeks, and she has referred me to a psychiatrist to see if I have depression, anxiety or PTSD or something else entirely. This is something I've avoided doing for over 2 years.

As my GP said sounds like the pain has finally gotten too much for you, and you are actually ready to get to the bottom of it. So my long period of defenses and denial is not that unusual apparently.

So Awakening might actually be ready for an awakening after all.. fingers crossed.