I don't know your husband's history, but I know with my husband the biggest reason he finally got diagnosed and started treatment was because the anger was getting out of control. We had the police at our house and it threatened his Military career. It was the straw that broke the camel's back, so to speak.

Because of this, it was one of the first things that the counsellors worked on - controlling the anger and learning how to communicate better during a disagreement. I'm sure it is because the anger can be so dangerous and they want to take care of that first before someone gets hurt.

Perhaps your husband's silence and changing the subject is his way of avoiding an argument. I would say that is a sign of progress, although very frustrating I'm sure.

I'm very much like you in that I want things taken care of RIGHT NOW. We also have 2 children at home. I'm beginning to understand though that the more I push, the less likely I am to get a desirable outcome from him. If I just leave it be, he will usually address it later after he's thought about it. One thing I think about sufferers is that their "trigger" reaction is often to defend themselves, and often with anger. Reactions are much better after they have time to process.

"Patience is a virtue," and it's one I'm working REALLY hard on myself. I'm awful at it, but I think I'm getting better, and being here and seeing that there are other people out there struggling with it too, makes it much easier somehow.