Thank you,
No I am not in any therapy. I had been given some depression meds but they all freak me out. The only one that seemed to help was lexapro but it also made me into a zombie and unresponsive to my wife. So I quit taking that a couple years ago. Most of the time when I am feeling secure I am alright. As long as I keep my mouth shut things go ok. But if I feel things are not going well I fall into a very dark mood. Self loathing and guilt. When I say not going well it could be something as simple as not being able to pay a bill on time or keep a promise I made to a friend even tho that friend doesnt mind if I cant make it. I am usually the guy you call when it absolutely has to be done. When I screw something up I have a very hard time accepting the failure.

Anyway, "trauma therapist". How does one go about finding one of these? Can my primary care giver (General Practitioner) refer me? I will have to find out about this.

Thank you.