I'm pretty good when it comes to not comparing my trauma to others. I know that ANY trauma can cause PTSD no matter how "mild" it seems to those who weren't in it. I know that what may traumatize one, may not traumatize another.

Something that I DO compare myself on is "recovering" from the trauma. It's been almost 10 years since the abuse ended and it's still ruining my life. I'm not social (or if I am, it's forced), I hate intimacy, I have horrible phobias of things that I know aren't dangerous (anymore), I have flashbacks, the list goes on.

These thoughts came up today while in line at the grocery store and reading the cover of a magazine. The person on the cover was kidnapped and recovered a period of time later. They don't seem to have any phobias surrounding their trauma and is no longer sorry it happened, it's just part of who they are. I didn't read the whole thing but it just made me think about how long I've been safe and how messed up I still am.

Why can't I "get over" it?

I don't know why I'm writing this. I just needed to get it out to people who might understand.