I am sorry that I did not reply right away. Somehow I forgot about the forum after leaving my introduction message, and re-discovered it in my favorites. (I need to remove hundreds of garbage links in my favorites so as not to loose better ones.)

There were actually 2 major traumatic events that I suffered in the army, among the general fear of other issues like fear and discrimination for being diagnosed with bipolar disorder.

The first event was being attacked by a much larger than myself barracks mate in AIT electronics school who sincerely acted like he was going to kill me. Before the incident I had gone to Bethesda Naval Hospital for a week to visit my dad who was treated for being an alcoholic. They had a program for family members and told me that I might have problems because of my father. I really did not want to think about his problems, or that I had any, so ACOA added an element of uncertainty to my life.

It was the idea of ACOA and my alcoholic father which probably made me act stupid enough to be friendly to the Ass H. barracks mate. I heard that he was leaving to be married, so I tried to wish him well. Then he attacked me, put me in a bear hug, and seriously acted like he was trying to collapse my chest. Others in the barracks got him off of me and I left stunned and about ready to pass out. Someone told me that I should probably leave for a while, and I started walking. In a trance I walked into the woods for miles and hours, thinking to myself that I could not survive the army. (This was similar to how I had thought of my father when he was drinking.)

After I eventually returned hours later, I found out that the guy who attacked me had left to be married. No one had any idea why he attacked me, other than that he did not like me for some reason. Thinking that I put it behind me, I became a distinguished graduate of the army electronics school.
A year later I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder when I complained that I was having mood problems which I thought were related to growing up with my father being an alcoholic.

The second major threat to my life came after another year (2 years from the first). I was sitting depressed in a barracks common area that went to 4 rooms of 3 bunks. A roommate and 3 of his friends arrived outside the common area door, asking to be let in because he forgot his key. Either the depression or lithium was making me slow, and the roommate was a real jerk about it. Drunk, they all got in my face to harass me. I got scared and went into the room locking the door. A few of them then tried climbing up to the second story window to get in.

Afraid of what might happen, I managed to escape and ran to the company headquarters a few blocks away. I told them exactly what happened. Then my roommate and his friends arrived shortly after me, claiming that I want crazy and was threatening, etc. Though I asked for another room, I was forced to wait several days. While waiting I secretly crawled under the fence at my electronics detachment and slept in an unused storage shed. After getting a new room, my mind became worse, I missed formations, etc, received an Article 15, etc… no one gave a damn. I wanted to kill myself to escape. Eventually I was let out of the army with the claim of a non-medical personality disorder.

The VA gave me medical help because the bipolar disorder was documented. Hints at the other events are documented in counseling statements on my WhyHope.com website.

Currently I have started protesting in front of the local VA, as I describe on WhyHope.com. The VA and government leaders do not seem to care about truth, so protesting is my last option. The reason that I am writing so well with bipolar disorder is due to a lot of practice and a little genius. My doctors failed me so I have been learning to help myself as I can. A non-quack doctor with wisdom and perception might help me deal with the issues that still hold me back. Instead of killing myself to escape, I will risk confronting government leaders and the public about these issues until something happens. (If they don’t want me annoying them then they should show compassion for a change.)

Michael Lake