rabcam
20-07-2006, 02:40 PM
I'm not sure when it started, but all through my childhood I had suffered emotional abuse, verbal abuse, and also later in my teen years, sexual abuse.
The times lately that I seem to relive a lot now are the teen years in high school. I was on seizure meds because I'm an epileptic and they had turned me into a walking zombie. I would get ridiculed to my face all through high school, and would freeze. I couldn't respond and would go in the bathroom and cry. I'm sure the pills contributed also. I was on a lot of meds at that time. It has been almost 30 years since that time and even with conseling and meds for it, I still relive some of those days. I have a hard time in crowds of people. I'm ok shopping as long as everyone is moving. It's the sitting still around them that gets to me. I never used to be that way until then. I remember back then I had no feelings. I just felt numb to everything. I thought I'd be dead by the time school was out. I couldn't see past those years. I was wondering, about a half a year ago I had been put on lyrica for my seizures and also was prescribed to wear a seizure helmet. I started feeling some of the ridiculing around people just if they happen to be looking at me. I can tell myself in my head it doesn't make sense, but it feels just like it did back then. I had heard from others that the lyrica had changed their moods and emotions. I'm guessing it's a combination between the two, and also my self-consciousness. I never used to be this bad, but seem to have gotten worst through the years, and more so even now. I don't know if the lyrica has anything to do with this. Does anyone out there know anything about lyrica, or know anyone who is on it? I feel like tapering off this one if this continues, because I'd rather put up with the seizures than the emotional pain again. I can handle the physical, but have more trouble dealing with the emotional pain.
The times lately that I seem to relive a lot now are the teen years in high school. I was on seizure meds because I'm an epileptic and they had turned me into a walking zombie. I would get ridiculed to my face all through high school, and would freeze. I couldn't respond and would go in the bathroom and cry. I'm sure the pills contributed also. I was on a lot of meds at that time. It has been almost 30 years since that time and even with conseling and meds for it, I still relive some of those days. I have a hard time in crowds of people. I'm ok shopping as long as everyone is moving. It's the sitting still around them that gets to me. I never used to be that way until then. I remember back then I had no feelings. I just felt numb to everything. I thought I'd be dead by the time school was out. I couldn't see past those years. I was wondering, about a half a year ago I had been put on lyrica for my seizures and also was prescribed to wear a seizure helmet. I started feeling some of the ridiculing around people just if they happen to be looking at me. I can tell myself in my head it doesn't make sense, but it feels just like it did back then. I had heard from others that the lyrica had changed their moods and emotions. I'm guessing it's a combination between the two, and also my self-consciousness. I never used to be this bad, but seem to have gotten worst through the years, and more so even now. I don't know if the lyrica has anything to do with this. Does anyone out there know anything about lyrica, or know anyone who is on it? I feel like tapering off this one if this continues, because I'd rather put up with the seizures than the emotional pain again. I can handle the physical, but have more trouble dealing with the emotional pain.