metis-siren
22-04-2007, 11:02 AM
Hello Everyone,
For now I'll go by my screen name - it was thoughtfully created and has served me well over the years. I am Metis, which has something I've had to learn quite a bit about - being native wasn't necessarily something I grew up with - more than polishing the wood carvings and occasionally lighting sweet grass. The word also the name of the Greek goddess of wisdom and deep thought.
I'm twenty two, and a university student. I've made it my life's mission to turn what's happened to me into something positive. Through understanding and education, I've made it my quest to do research about the under-researched, and push for change where it needs to be. I'm 4 years into my undergraduate honours degree in Sociology (I'm minoring in Law, and Aboriginal Studies), and while all my friends from first year are graduating, I'm looking at another 2-3 years. Its somewhat disappointing, but I know everyone learns at their own pace.
I've been in therapy since I was 14, and my current psychiatrist (3 years and going) are developing a nice little niche. I live with a host of conditions, and when all is said and done, they total approximately 22 health conditions (they tend to keep up with my age, sadly). I've been diagnosed with PTSD (when I was 15), moderate depression, fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue syndrome, a host of other chronic pain conditions, migraines, and a plethora of other conditions.
As for what I've been through - though I'm in counselling, I rarely talk about the actual abuse, I talk more about what it has done to me on a daily basis. But generally speaking, this is what I survived: I was sexually, psychologically, physically, emotionally... abused by my step-father for eleven years - starting at the tender age of three. My mother was often abusive towards me, or watching my step-dad abuse me. When I reached high school, my step-father took a step back on the abuse, at least sexually, and I got into a fairly serious relationship with my boyfriend, who was a couple years older, who subsequently decideded to sexually abuse me in every way he could imagine. I became pregnant at the age of 15 from one of the rapes - I miscarried. My family wouldn't believe me - and here's where it gets to me - both my mom and my step-dad were social workers - my mom had worked in Women's Shelters for those leaving domestic violence, and my step-dad was actively counselling sexual abuse survivors! My parents decided after a botched suicide attempt (more along the lines of trying to be numb emotionally) that it was time to ship me off to my biological father. A man who has abandoned me after finding out that his step-son was sexually abusing me, when I was 8. That didn't go over so well, I moved at least 10 times in less than a year. I ended up, after being passed around from relative to relative, living in a group home for eight months, and then in a youth housing co-op. I somehow managed, even with abhorable living conditions, and being chronically ill - in and out of hospitals and doctor's offices, missing at least half the year of school to graduate at the same time as everyone else, and with better grades than most of my friends. I managed to get to university, and crashed.
There's a lot more to it, but that's a starting point.
I have a good boyfriend now, and we have a dog together (who has been trained to pick up on my emotional wellbeing and behave accordingly - he's such a sweety). My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and an half, though I live by myself - and he lives at home - things are good.
So I suppose this is my long winded introduction. It's nice to meet everyone here.
Blessings.
For now I'll go by my screen name - it was thoughtfully created and has served me well over the years. I am Metis, which has something I've had to learn quite a bit about - being native wasn't necessarily something I grew up with - more than polishing the wood carvings and occasionally lighting sweet grass. The word also the name of the Greek goddess of wisdom and deep thought.
I'm twenty two, and a university student. I've made it my life's mission to turn what's happened to me into something positive. Through understanding and education, I've made it my quest to do research about the under-researched, and push for change where it needs to be. I'm 4 years into my undergraduate honours degree in Sociology (I'm minoring in Law, and Aboriginal Studies), and while all my friends from first year are graduating, I'm looking at another 2-3 years. Its somewhat disappointing, but I know everyone learns at their own pace.
I've been in therapy since I was 14, and my current psychiatrist (3 years and going) are developing a nice little niche. I live with a host of conditions, and when all is said and done, they total approximately 22 health conditions (they tend to keep up with my age, sadly). I've been diagnosed with PTSD (when I was 15), moderate depression, fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue syndrome, a host of other chronic pain conditions, migraines, and a plethora of other conditions.
As for what I've been through - though I'm in counselling, I rarely talk about the actual abuse, I talk more about what it has done to me on a daily basis. But generally speaking, this is what I survived: I was sexually, psychologically, physically, emotionally... abused by my step-father for eleven years - starting at the tender age of three. My mother was often abusive towards me, or watching my step-dad abuse me. When I reached high school, my step-father took a step back on the abuse, at least sexually, and I got into a fairly serious relationship with my boyfriend, who was a couple years older, who subsequently decideded to sexually abuse me in every way he could imagine. I became pregnant at the age of 15 from one of the rapes - I miscarried. My family wouldn't believe me - and here's where it gets to me - both my mom and my step-dad were social workers - my mom had worked in Women's Shelters for those leaving domestic violence, and my step-dad was actively counselling sexual abuse survivors! My parents decided after a botched suicide attempt (more along the lines of trying to be numb emotionally) that it was time to ship me off to my biological father. A man who has abandoned me after finding out that his step-son was sexually abusing me, when I was 8. That didn't go over so well, I moved at least 10 times in less than a year. I ended up, after being passed around from relative to relative, living in a group home for eight months, and then in a youth housing co-op. I somehow managed, even with abhorable living conditions, and being chronically ill - in and out of hospitals and doctor's offices, missing at least half the year of school to graduate at the same time as everyone else, and with better grades than most of my friends. I managed to get to university, and crashed.
There's a lot more to it, but that's a starting point.
I have a good boyfriend now, and we have a dog together (who has been trained to pick up on my emotional wellbeing and behave accordingly - he's such a sweety). My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and an half, though I live by myself - and he lives at home - things are good.
So I suppose this is my long winded introduction. It's nice to meet everyone here.
Blessings.