Therapy and The Candle Self of Navigation

[Silvisrivers]

From 1984 or so I embarked on some therapy which I still have which I know has kept me here - I wish I could have afforded a lot more than I paid for because its been very helpful ...My inner-life like a lot of other peoples was off limits emotionally - I grew up in a culture like that and a family system that was emotionally unreflective ...Later I realised that our culture was producing warped and pained people and people with half selves - or in my case hardly a Self ...

It was the bit left over though that burned with some kind of anguish and need just to be alive .... The edge treader with a candle ....Yeah ....So I have a long tale but moreover I am very open and understand the "tar-lands" and darknesses of the inner world and why tears along with slowly connected feelings create insights and lights that help to make survival sad but actually bearable ..

Grief is a major key to surviving the damaged form of oneself, and de-terrorisiing feeling-states and living with them is another gift of therapy and grief ...

But hell its not easy ...I've learned in therapy its not about absolute solutions and the end of pain - its about being able to tolerate one-self and put a hand into the hand of part of oneself that also recognises that long ago and hand of help was never there ...

I am Silvisrivers the poet and artist ...

[She Cat]

Welcome to the forum.:hello:

[nie]

Welcome to the forum Silvisrivers.

[veiled]

Welcome to the forum.

[Silvisrivers]

Well I did some poetry today and posted an image I had been working with - it helps me in my ragmented state....This time of year is I have no doubt is ragged for me ....I like the term "raggedy man" (Mad Max Thunderdome) ...I like words they are my friends like dogs and cats around me ....

[Silvisrivers]

Is it possible to show images here because I am an artist too ...A storyteller of the human condition....

[Silvisrivers]

Ah I see the image code is on....That means I can show off Purple Bunny... He's my inner magic ...At least I hope I can ...I'll try ...

I hope this shows Purple Bunny discovering the Law of Hilarity - otherwise people will laugh at me .....Mind you that's part of the law

[Silvisrivers]

Wow .....There you go .....I only show the magical side of him on PTSD & other similar sites... Its a matter of care .....

Or as he might say :


When in the company of pain
Care is the measure
And the quiet eye reign ......

.

[Silvisrivers]

Anyway .......Hello.......I forgot that....Space is numinous for me - alive with creativity even when empty so I get excited ..... ...

[anthony]

Welcome to the forum. Please read the new members forum (http://www.ptsdforum.org/forum45.html) for an understanding of how to be within this forum.

Images must be attached, not inline to load from a third party website.

[veiled]

opps sorry I did not catch that.

[Harry]

Hi Silvisrivers, looking forward hearing more from you.

Sounds like you are a very reflective man. What you write about "I grew up in a culture like that and a family system that was emotionally unreflective" really resonates in me. I also felt like like that when I grew up, and suffered great emotional pain because of that.
Thanks for posting and looking fw reading more from you.

[Felicitas]

But hell its not easy ...I've learned in therapy its not about absolute solutions and the end of pain - its about being able to tolerate one-self and put a hand into the hand of part of oneself that also recognises that long ago and hand of help was never there ...


This meets me where I am at. Recognising that help was not there is a very tough part of my trauma. I have not come to peace there. I trusted people who I thought were trustworthy but turned out to be very naiv, selfabsorbed and not knowledgable.
Sorry I am writing all about myself and not really about you. i have given so much in the past, that I just want to be with myself.
By the way Art is what fills my heart and makes me enjoy life.
Oh a question comes to my mind there.
i lived in this brown/grey third world city for over two years, I painted the wall behind my sofa bright orange. That was the only friendly warm colour in the whole city for me to see. I suffered so much from not having colour and beauty around me, while help was never there.

[Seeking_Nirvana]

Hi Silvisrivers and welcome to the forum. You are very creative!

Tammy

[Silvisrivers]

Thankyou for your advice . Could you take my stuff off here please and end my account.

Many thanks . SR .

[veiled]

No, your content will not be removed, guidelines were provided when you joined. http://www.ptsdforum.org/thread6156.html

[Silvisrivers]

Dear Anthony SEO (17/12/2007)
The lack of constant edit facility here which disappears for posters and the way you capture people's material so they cannot alter it, without making that absolutely clear and inside the a vulnerable area of mental health matters is wrong. The image I originally put here is in no sense copyrighted to you or those on this board . In fact you or someone managing this facility took it and altered the digital code on it so it was permanently captured because it was only hyperlinked originally and I rook that link away from the original source. That action means I did not consent to your use of it...You would get a lot more co-operation if you were more considerate . Unsubscribe me Anthony . Be decent about it ...
Silvisrivers

[becvan]

If you had read the new members begin here forum, you would have read these two important pieces of information.

http://www.ptsdforum.org/thread931.html and the other was provided for you.

We do not remove content on request. You also agreed to this policy when you joined. Also, in our editorial policy it clearly states how to post an image and not to provide an external link. Which you did anyways, so we had to fix it.

You consented to this when you joined the forum.

If you want to leave then leave. We will not be removing any content. This conversation is closed.

bec

[just tina]

Hi, Silvis. Purple Bunny is really tight.

[Awakening]

Is there a drug I'm missing out on?

[just tina]

That's probably a very common question, with PTSD, Awakening ;)

I ask myself that all the time.