New To The Board Here.... Agoraphobia Aspect Of PTSD Very Hard Right Now

[oksofineimnutz]

just wanted to say hi and introduce myself..yes, im one extremly, lets say..."complicated" individual.....ive been struggling with PTSD for most of my life (apparently) and was diagnosed with that, and several other dibilitating freaking mental disorders, (including major depression also) almost 6 years ago. having gone threw TONS of therapy, and trying to learn how to break threw it, it seems as tho all i can do is learn how to live with it and well, that has become quite a struggle. ive also got agoraphobia in the most horrible way, and the days have become worse and worse in spite of all the meds, therapy, etc. i just cant seem to overcome it. and now especially with the holidays and having children at home (being a single parent also) well, it seems almost a struggle to open my eyes in the morning. i do. i have kidz i have to take care of and yes, they have learned how to work around my issues, and continue to help me and support me in my efforts. thank goodness for good kidz. all that said, they are still kidz and i feel so bad that my PTSD coupled with the agoraphobia is really making it a bad time of year for me since i am being forced to leave the house to do the one shopping of the year they cannot do. Presents! Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!! i wish i could just chicken s**t out and give them money instead, but yeah, i cant do that to them. i guess why i am here is to maybe have a place where i can come to and listen and maybe learn some. i dont know. just thought id write a little about myself since i am new.

[anthony]

Welcome to the forum. Please read the new members forum (http://www.ptsdforum.org/forum45.html) for an understanding of how to be within this forum.

[Felicitas]

Welcome. I also have kids that are great and it is hard to see them suffer because of my PTSD. We can be happy that we have kids. It sounds you really love them.

[Seeking_Nirvana]

Welcome to the forum. This is a great place to find information to help you with PTSD

Tammy

[EmoxxKid]

Nice to meet you and I know you will love it here, this is a great place for info and support.

I myself am suffering right now a bit from agoraphobia....it sucks...indeed.

Geneva

[She Cat]

Welcome to the forum:hello:

[becvan]

Welcome to the forum.

bec

[hollyberry]

love the user id...welcome to the forum

[tankertoy]

welcome to the forum.. :D
carlos

[goingonhope]

Ok so fine.........Hello, and Welcome!

I too have had PTSD much of my life. Though I don't suffer with the symptom of agoraphobia, I know all too well how painful this with depression from our PTSD is. My sister suffers and has for so many, many yrs. now. She too was prescribed meds. Meds for anxiety, then meds for severe depression, then meds for inability to sleep nights, and then meds for intrusive thoughts. Quite honestly, I've always seen those meds themselves (that she takes) as her first obstacle to overcome, as we both have severe PTSD, and yet have gone on to suffer much differently in severity and duration of symptoms. We started out in practically the same shape and with many of the same and same type trauma(s), but the levels of improvement have greatly differed. I was diagnosed severe PTSD, and indeed suffered severe PTSD. She's yet to be diagnosed and treated properly. It would appear that she's been diagnosed and medicated for all it's symptoms, yet I know she has PTSD. For sometime now she disregards therapists words, accepts psychiat. help, and cheifly believes her own diagnosis of herself, which she states, is that she's simply crazy; I don't believe it. There's no doubt in my mind, she has PTSD!

Anyways, Welcome to the forum, ...Ok so fine... and please know you're not the only one complicated upon the forum; Me too.

Please take care, and good for you for taking care of your kids this holiday and despite how you feel. :thumbs-up

The doing it too often comes before the feeling better.

My best to you and your kids ! ! !


Hope

[oksofineimnutz]

Thank You all for your kind words of welcoming!! It felt like a big hug when i logged into here this morning and yes, i needed one! Im having a kind of inner struggle with myself here lately it seems....trying not to beat up on myself for my disabilities and yet keeping up enough self pep talks inside my head to help try to boost me into the day. Im grateful for the tools i learned in therapy all those years i was in it...so glad so much of it sunk in dispite my heavily medicated state *dr perscribed/monitored of course* but yet and still....UGGGGGHHHHHHH!
I have to go out again today, kicking and screaming an throwing a fit inside my head.....but can not back out or make excuses today....its parent/teacher conferences for my 3rd and 5th grader!!!! I swear, if it wasnt for my kidz i would never leave the house!! they are the ONE reason that i know i have to keep this fight up with myself to try and overcome this stupid ptsd chit and all that comes with it!!!!!!!!
so other than dreading the day ahead for myself....i suppose i can focus on how good coming in the door when i get back to my safe abode is going to feel....how yummy that steamy hot cuppa green tea is going to taste.........well, that and the fact that i know im going to get great reports on my lil ones lololol *not one absence nor one tardy for either since the beginning of the school year, 3rd grader chosen to be 3rd grade student council leader, 5th grader is Mr. Correct Answer when teacher is exhausted listening to all the incorrect answers*
yeah, oksofineimnutz but my kidz shine!! i guess thats my saving fact right there. at least im doing THAT right!! In spite all and what not!! well folks, i thank you for letting me babble on and now im finding a smile on my face sitting here as i type...so im going to roll on outta here with that and say Thank You once again!

[Grama-Herc]

Welcome to the forum from a fellow member who also has severe agorphobia. If youj ever want to take or ask me for survival tips just PM me or whatever. I have been living with it most of my life as well. I have developed some ways to handle the necessary issue of life like shopping for the holidays, etc. and would be glad to help in any way!

Folks here are pretty great with help, advice and sharing so anyway WELCOME