Another Round with PTSD

[rabbitmoon]

Hi All,

My name is Laura and I live in Maryland. I am married to a wonderful man who is very understanding, even when he doesn't entirely understand. He looked at me a couple of weeks ago and noted that I had a faraway look in my eyes and he wanted me to come back. It amazed me how accurately he assessed the situation since I had just realized what was happening. Three nights of nightmares will do that to you--especially when it has been years since there was one.

I was sexually abused as a child (age 6 to 11) by a close relative. I had some bad years and was in therapy and diagnosed with PTSD 11 years ago. I am 36 now. I thought I had managed to get passed the bad dreams and the anxiety and the memories, but back they come. I don't want to get to the point in my life where I push away everyone that cares about me and I don't want to get lost too far away or run away again-life is too good right now.

So, here I am. I am not quite sure what I expect to find, but I think I would like to just talk to other people who feel as I do and face it all once again and maybe for the last time.

Laura :smile:

[empowered]

Welcome to the forum Laura :hello:

[She Cat]

Welcome to the forum. There is plenty of information and support here. I wish you well.

[nie]

Welcome to the forum Laura.

[Lisa]

Hi Laura... welcome. I'm glad you found us. Sounds like it's been a long-haul huh?

There's a lot of good advice, support, and information here... I hope you find it helpful for you.

[becvan]

Welcome to the forum.

Please read this section first: http://www.ptsdforum.org/forum45.html

bec

[pandora]

Welcome to the forum!

[goingonhope]

Welcome to the forum, rabbitmoon.

Hope

[kers]

Welcome! Poke around a bit. This is a great place to work on ourselves.

[sally]

hi
welcome to the fourm I'm glad you have a good man too. the night mares can sneak up on you anytime I still get alot of night monsters. so your not alone
sally

[vee_dog]

Welcome rabbit moon. I'm glad you have a supportive husband. I'm a Carer for my wife who suffers from PTSD due to childhood abuse. This is a good place to be for help.

[hollyberry]

welcome to the forum

[anthony]

Welcome to the forum Laura... look forward to chatting more with you.

[sunnydaze]

So glad you have an understanding husband. I also do but I try to hide from him what I am feeling or going through. Most likely he knows and says nothing to me
sunnydaze

[dljwhitewolf]

I was skipping stones one day, pissed at God, asking him what is the benefit to ptsd, hyper vigilance, distrust, lack of good emotions, I could not come up with anything positive.
I left the beach, still pissed at God for not telling me something good, when I ran into a friend.
I asked him, Danny, what is the positive to all the abuse I went thru including sexual abuse,
he asked me did I ever let them have sex with me?
NO!!!! I said.
He then said then they never took anything from you.
I said I am not a virgin, and have had sex since then as well.
He said yes, you have had sex, you have never made love.
Pow!!!!! right between the eyes
he said they never took what you did not give
they may have touched my body, but they never got my soul
hope my bandaid works for you as well