View Full Version : What's This About - Being Perfect?
dshanks
09-05-2008, 03:58 PM
:dontknow:I have been doing a new job at work for the last 2 weeks and all I do is worry about my performance. I cannot come across as being incompetent (the inner voice says)and I know that I have to give myself a chance, but it is as though I am being judged by an invisible person. I know that person is one of my past abusers but I should not let this person interfere with my learning. It caused me a great deal of anxiety during the last couple of weeks, but I can't seem to stop the inner dialogue. It feels as though I will be fired should I not get it right right away. Has anyone else had this experience? I believe it is known as paranoia!
Starting a new job is hard no matter what. It just seems like there is so much information to take in. I hated feeling like everyone else knew more than I did. Give yourself some time...it'll come. Two weeks into it is awfully early to start judging your performance. I don't know what you do for a job, but getting one is a milestone. Congrats!
Cecilia
10-05-2008, 12:22 AM
That same damn invisible person lives at my house and points out every flaw and makes me feel guilty if my house is not perfect. I wish he would pack his bags and move on out! That invisible person is harder on me than any boss I ever had. That invisible person is created by me.
I have to self-talk and say ok, invisible person, I hear you, but you are wrong. You are caused by my own creative thinking and right now in this moment, I choose to be positive and do what I can do in this moment and then move to the next.
2quilt
10-05-2008, 02:01 AM
I do self-talk too, telling myself that the perfectionist is dead, that I only have to do my best, and that's all I can do. My work pleases me, because I know that I did the best I could do. All I have to do is please 2quilt's standards because if I try to please everyone else, I would never be successful.
Grama-Herc
10-05-2008, 03:06 AM
I've had to name my self talker. His name is Ralph and he is an idiot. He has no common sense and is extremely irritating. Because of that I get the yell and shout and scream at him. Just have to be careful to not do it in public, lest I end up in a soft and quiet room. Although some times that sounds like a nice place to relax!
Anyway, our self talk can be very destructive to us. I think we all do it and it is
something we all need to try and get a handle on before it does cause us trouble.
Listening to all the negative comments we make to ourselves is hard.
She Cat
10-05-2008, 05:14 AM
If I could only put a gag on mine, things would be so much better. I am depressed, but the MOUTH in my head is making things a whole lot worse.
2quilt
10-05-2008, 05:52 AM
That Ralph fella sure gets around!
Grama-Herc
10-05-2008, 05:54 AM
Personally I think Ralph is a "troll" Ha ! ! I made a funny!
And I meant for that to be funny, no smart arse or anything. :rofl:
I've had to name my self talker. His name is Ralph and he is an idiot. He has no common sense and is extremely irritating. Because of that I get the yell and shout and scream at him. Just have to be careful to not do it in public, lest I end up in a soft and quiet room. Although some times that sounds like a nice place to relax!
You are so funny.....you make me laugh....:rofl:
Tell Ralph I said hello! Take care. Sisu
Cecilia
10-05-2008, 09:24 AM
I named my guardian angel and I talk to it. My husband thinks I am crazy. Can you imagine if I start screaming at Ralph, too?
I'm so tired today a few days rest sounds very appealing!
Grama-Herc
10-05-2008, 12:15 PM
Cecilia
Maybe you could introduce your guardian angel and Ralph to eachother-----let them fight it out while you take a nice vacation?
Cecilia
10-05-2008, 03:01 PM
:rofl: That might just work!
dshanks
10-05-2008, 03:02 PM
Thanks everyone for the response. It really helps to know I am not alone. I just wonder what I am going to name my inner voice, or should I say...
monster!!!:thumbs-up
Grama-Herc
11-05-2008, 02:19 AM
We could have a contest and call it "Name that troll" :rofl:
Winner gets "1" free venting rant without getting in trouble!
Sorry could not resist being a smart arse. But then I never could. It is very important that your little voice have the appropriate name. Otherwise, it does not pay any attention to you and that is not good.
Cecilia
11-05-2008, 10:28 AM
Grama-Herc you are on a roll! :smile:
My son named his stuffed animal "Ozroe" or "Ozrow"; Don't now know where he came up with it, but it is fun to say.
I can see dshanks in the grocery isle cursing Ozroe. Nobody would assume you were talking to them. They might think you were a little nutty, but nobody would say "are you talking to me?" If they did you could say, "Is your name Ozroe?"