Husband's Bear story

Darling Husband goes hiking in the mountains almost daily. He has had close encounters with many rattlesnakes, coyotes and one scared mountain lion.

Wednesday, he was hiking alone on a mountain trail when he heard a loud, inhuman noise that sounded like an angry bear with bronchitis, growling. We have had almost daily bear sightings and mountain lion sightings in the past 2 weeks. Several pets have gone missing.

The awful noise was coming from up ahead of him, behind some trees. The bear took ragged inhalations and horrible exhalations. Darling Husband froze. He stood still for about a minute while the bear continued to growl. DH slowly bent down and grabbed a rock, put his whistle in his mouth, grabbed his airhorn in the other hand and tried to stay as calm as possible, pending his death by mauling.

Finally the trees moved, but DH could not see the bear. DH took off his camelback water bladder and held it above his head, trying to appear larger to the animal that would be eating him. DH could see something in the trees moving toward him, then veer off away from him. Maybe the smell of human urine had turned off the bear.

Then in the clearing, DH saw the animal.

It was wearing green pants, a green shirt, and had a white beard. The forest ranger walked down the trail toward Darling Husband, to his great relief.

When DH caught up with the ranger, he stopped him and asked why he was making that terrible noise. The ranger replied that he was doing trail maintenance; a tree had fallen on the trail, and he was cutting it up.

DH had heard the sawing noises.