For weeks now I've wanted to join the reg. live chat, and guess what? I'm scared sh't. I've been directed and driven and commanded by fears for too much of my life, and yet in many instances I've been told I have tremendous courage. What's what? Someone won't you please encourage me at least once, bc after the first time, perhaps it will get easier.

I will go in... Join me... I will admit not in good shape today but hey I will be waiting

but I cannot type worth a shit in real time....

o.k. veiled if your still there I'm in there, I clicked and it hasn't killed me yet.

Veiled, really thanks that was encouraging and it didn't kill me....it hurt some....don't know exactly why at tthe moment. Sure I'll get better. Veiled again it was great to see you...no sh't, you look lovely, I only hope you felt better tonight. I just wish you felt better tonight. I just know you've got what it takes to see your process through. I think that should be apparent to many of us here on the forum, since you're such a large participant here, while juggling so much. Bless you, and lots of hugs.

Anxiety for me just exiting out of the live chat, I hope just clicking the x button in the upper right hand corner removes my name and exits me out.

yes, it exits you, I am known for a fast exit to at times, when I say bye, well it is bye! Not like no one knows where to find me. And thanks, after a bunch of puking I think I get a lovely glow ha ha ha...

Wish I could have been there! Great to hear that you did it Hope!

Speaking of hope I hope you feel better soon veiled. Thanks for encouraging or friend to try something new.

Once again great job!

I know how you feel hope... I have a phobia of the chat myself, although I have gone in lots and chatted. It's just the initial couple of minutes that always gets to me, if I can force myself to stand it for the first 2 minutes then I'm fine after that. I'm glad you were able to go in and found that it wasn't so bad!

Hey thanks batgirl, I'm opposite, and the first few minutes I do well and then afterwards oh' sh't.....numerous fears hit me with much anxiety. My head starts a' whirling with these thoughts and fears that -oh' someone else joined in, I'm no longer wanted, (inferiority, poor self-esteem) ... and, -any moment now I'm going to be abruptly left alone in this chat, without even a so long, others are all gonna' see and know and I'm just going to die from rejection. (unresolved fear). And, any minute now others will see just how darn' slow thinking and responding I am, get up, walk away and say the hell with me. (serious self-esteem issues & unresolved fears).

At this point, some of you may be thinking 'better you than me', ....wow, that's pretty bad.

I suppose there's got to be other people in this world riddled with fears and the challenge of overcoming them.

I use to be smart as whip, when I could control a drink and maintain a buzz. Use to work so, so well to clear away all the confusion and plant me right there in any given moment, allowing me to think straight and be uninhibited from my many fears.

Hoping my slow thinking is not the result of nuerolog. damage from having poisoned my body in the past with liquid crap people are suppose to inhale, not drink, and/or ingesting hazards we'all are suppose to stay away from.

It's that slow, slow, slow thought process and the effort that goes into most communication that I find causes me more stress, than I welcome.

Hey again thx, batgirl and I'll say, it was great while I could hang-in. And veiled, dam' you are funny...Now I understand the glow!.....much puking later.....what a glorious glow. LOL And, I will read on further within the forum and hope to find out how your last few days have been for you veiled. Feeling better, maybe....just maybe.

Bless you veiled and have been appreciating and thinking about that chat experience the other night, for the last few days. Credit it much for my last couple days of some relief, and joy, thx.