Hi my name is Renea my husband isn't a Veteran but he suffered an injury in 1999 that caused him to have 2 blood clots removed from his brain and because of this is suffers with Panic Attacks, depression, seizures and PSTD I love my husband very much but sometimes I am not very nice and I don't feel I am very supportive I am always worried about finances and that causes a lot of problems we have been together for about 13 yrs we have 4 beautiful children I just need to know what I can do to save our marriage and our family.

Hi Renea, and welcome.

You have come to the right place for help. My wife and I have been reading posts here for over a week, and we have made great progress in dealing with our problems.

My wife suffers from PTSD, so I know what it's like being the spouse of sufferer. She has also suffered from bouts of anxiety attacks. I love my wife very much, and have been using that love to make it from day to day. But that can only go so far when you don't know what the heck is going on, and I must admit, it had been getting harder with each episode of outbursts. It has helped both of us reading how others experience the exact same feelings and situations, knowing that she isn't "going crazy", and that others are dealing with these same issues and making it!

I don't have any answers for you, as I'm learning myself. But I can offer you an ear, and also some empathy, as I know exactly what you are going through.

Again, welcome, and good luck. Keep your head up, and remember there is light at the end of the tunnel (and it's not always a train!)

Warren

Hi Renea,

Welcome & big hugs to you!

I'm new here too & my husband has been a PTSD sufferer since Oct last year.
He has panic attacks & is currently going through med changes. I'll admit the journey we go on with them is sometimes quite a ride.

One thing I have noticed is that we partners have the same thing in common- We love our partners very much.

I have found this site to be a fantastic support for me, because now I don't feel like I'm alone with living with a partner who has PTSD.

As much as our loved ones around us can offer support, they really don't understand. At least here, they do.

Be kind to yourself.

Jods

Hi Renea,

Welcome to the forum and welcome to the journey of being a partner of someone with PTSD. It doesn't matter that your husband is not a veteran as we are not that exclusive here. In fact that was Anthony's initial aim.........to provide support for all people with PTSD, their families, partners, children, support people - whoever you may be. We have found, veteran or not (Anthony is a veteran) that the range of symptoms of PTSD is the same, some experience varying degrees of them or not at all but the symptoms are essentially the same. Same to the impact that it has on families. It is a constant battle to keep your familiy together and sane. Who really wants to walk out of years of hard work, disrupt children and break your heart at the same time? I suspect none of us! I guess its finding the balance between what are the worst aspects of living with PTSD and trying to balance that out with the good of life. I don't know about you but I'm pretty stubborn and not keen to be beaten by an illness that neither myself or my husband caused. Sure we are responsible for our crappy behaviour that sometimes adds to the chaos in our lives but we can do something about that. PTSD can also be managed to make lives more liveable for everybody. Anthony and I are in that dance and I imagine we will be for a long time to come. I love him or I wouldn't be here as it has been extremely hard and trying sometimes. You are not alone there.

Does your husband have support for him? By that I mean does he take medication, has he sought or does he get regular counselling and does he take care of himself - exercise, eat better, rest. AND always what about you? Hard with 4 children I know, I have a teenage step-son, a toddler and one on the way.....sometimes I think I am crazy! What can you do to save your family and your sanity? Encourage your husband to get some help (easier said than done I know), try and get some help for yourself and see if you can grab one of those support people to look after the kids while you have some time for you. Hard to do and women generally put themselves at the bottom of the list but you will see rewards for taking care of you. I am just starting to learn this valuable lesson. Men are very good at it, I think most of them (I do generalise and apologise to the male support people) are born with that gene, women need to learn how to do it. My husband and my teenage step-son are exceptional at caring for their needs first. The other thing that will help is chatting to us here, if you feel comfortable to do so. It helps to know that you are not alone.

Hello Renae,
We are here for each other and those we love. I've only posted a couple of times but I'm on the site when I need perspective, understanding and hope. The site gives me that.

You aren't alone. Please know that.