Was diagnosed in 04 but my life was not very good before that. I'm constantly depressed even though I've been on meds for almost three years. I see my social worker every other week and do inpatient therapy once a year anywhere from 30 to 45 days. I think its getting worse as my wife is at her wits end. I recently graduated from Grand Valley State University and that should be a good thing but I got in trouble with the law and I think thats pretty much ruined any chance at a career in the immediate future. I was speeding and a cop flashed his lights at me and I took off. I don't even remember fleeing but I eventually pulled over. Obviously charged with flee and elude in the 4th since for 33 years I had no criminal history. I still don't remember why I did it. I would've thought the court system would have granted me a brake, other than not sending me to jail as I just got probation, but its still a felony. This is just bothering me to no end. I already had enough problems but that put the cherry on top. I don't even have any friends anymore to talk to. I pushed them all away. I guess I've vented enough now. I suppose I'm not the only one out there. Perhaps someone has some advice for me. I don't know where to take my career aspirations with this felony hanging over my head.

Hi,

It's tough having PTSD and trying to have a career, isn't it?

I also am trying to get my life back on track. I'm finishing my law course so I should be working from later this year, but somehow I'm not very hopeful. The inability to think and process rational thoughts really sucks when you're doing law : (

It's ok, in regards to the felony. Take it easy. I don't have a criminal record but I think you need to give yourself a break before you consider continuing work. I understand about pushing all your friends away, it gets too much, simply because you don't heal to an extent that would allow you to socialise in a normal fashion. Maybe someone who has overcome a 'blemish' on their criminal record might be able to help.

But welcome and hope the board helps

Audrey

Welcome to the forum, GRUNT11B. I see they haven't changed the MOS nomenclature since I was in. I don't know how much help I can be at offering any solution to your problem, either problem really, as I'm in about as deep of a depression as I've ever been. I have a telephone that weighs 500 pounds and a front door that weighs 1000 pounds. That makes it REAL hard to leave the house or call someone when I get lonely. A big plus that I see in your life is a wife that hasn't given up on you, is she getting help for your PTSD too? This isn't just our problem, it's everybody who has chosen to put themselves in harms way, in spite of our PTSD. Sometimes people who are informed about how and why we do the things we do, find reasons to not give up, knowing that they are not at fault for what's happening to us, and hear or learn what others do to cope with this disorder. A significant other is one of the best therapies that a PTSD sufferer can have, to fight this problem. This is a disease of loneliness, it'll chase people away, then, even if we feel lonely, it saps our motivation to change it. Talking about it in these forums sure beats the hell outa experiencing the results of it out there. Or, maybe that's the meds kickkin it(I just had to lighten the moment, it was bummin me out too).
Just don't EVER give up, Bro,
WarHippy1%

Welcome to the forum Grunt.

My wife does get treated as well. She is on paxil and she attends my therapy sessions with me whenever she can. I have been feeling better lately as a couple of my former prof's said they would help me. They are both Vietnam vets and I also have a VA VOC REHAB employment specialist, who is a vet my age, making calls to employers to see who will work with me and who won't. I suppose if they won't then I probably don't want to work for them anyway. I guess its better to have a degree with this problem than have this problem and not have a degree. Oh well, I'll be on these forums for awhile now and will keep everyone posted.

Grunt, it sounds as though your really looking for significant change, and that is promising to hear, really it is. This is the hardest part for any sufferer to get past, being the decision whether they "really" want to help themselves and get better, or whether they just want to get a little better, but not suffer any pain in order to do so. Your overall attitude is sounding great, which means half the battle has honestly already been won for you. Well done....

hey! welcome to the forum, grunt.

Grunt, Hi & Welcome to the forum !