I should start by saying that I'm not unfamiliar with PTSD. I've known two people affected by it, and have researched the topic online quite a bit. But I find myself at wit's end at the moment.

I have a friend who lives halfway across the country from me who has PTSD as a result of being repeatedly raped a number of years ago. She functioned until recently, not even knowing she had this, until she was triggered by an online relationship she got involved in.

She's been suffering nightmares, mood swings, severe depression, and talking about suicide. She doesn't *want* to kill herself, but she's afraid she will. I convinced her to make an appointment with a psychologist, but she didn't keep the appointment

As much as she's afraid of continuing to suffer the way she is now, and of the potential for her to kill herself, it turns out that she's phobic of going to a therapist. She went to one once years ago, and from what I've gathered, it was not a good experience, and may even be tied in her mind to the sexual abuse. She is more frightened of going in to see the doctor than she is of the consequences of not doing it. She's also afraid that with unstable behavior and suicidal thoughts, she will be committed. Primarily, she's afraid of having to talk about her trauma and the effect revisiting it will have

She recognizes how dire her need for therapy and medication is. She's willing to do it and wants to get help. But she can't. The phobia is a genuine phobia. She is smart, self-aware, and finds herself looking on as she feels like she's going insane, and she feels helpless because she can't do the thing with the most promise of helping her.

I have a call in to the doctor she made the appointment with; I'm hoping the doctor can give me some advice

But I'm also hoping for any help someone on here might be able to give. I got the idea from her, actually; she said she visited a PTSD forum in hopes of finding a support group but found she couldn't read it.

I've been through everything I can think of – I've been as much of a surrogate therapist as I can be, but it's beyond my help. My friend says she's afraid she won't be alive next year. I'm afraid of the same thing. Since she's not actively planning suicide, this really isn't a suicide hotline issue. It's more of a really urgent help-someone-overcome-a-phobia issue.

Many shrinks will visit if required.... I would even advise to find one that will based on her phobia to get her past this initial aspect and then travelling out once again to the doctors and therapists. Its a trial and error process.... if she cannot get to them, bring them to her. She should be able to do that on the phone herself.

Does she have any friends or family closer to her that might be able to help her.....maybe assist her in any way? It is great to see friends that want to help....she is lucky to have a friend like you.

She doesn't have any friends nearby (casual co-worker friends, but not anyone she would talk to about his). She lives with her mom, but doesn't trust her, has been hiding this from her. She has a six-year-old son she loves dearly.

I didn't have much luck with the doctor. Her receptionist told me she doesn't make house calls, and suggested I have my friend go to the hospital, which is laughable. To someone afraid to even go to a therapist, someone afraid of being committed, going to the hospital is even less of an option. She then suggested I call the police if my friend is talking about harming herself. Only problem is, what would the police do? Try to talk her into going to the hospital! And I'm sure the effect on an already scared person would be just lovely.

*sigh*

I wonder if I should call the other pscychologists in that medical group (it's the one covered by her insurance) and ask if they do house calls? I should ask my friend if she thinks she could do a house call - or even start by talking to a doctor on the phone.

That sounds like a good start. Have you expressed your concern about her that you have and how worried you are..Maybe remind her that her 6 year old needs her around and needs a healthy mom around to grow and become the best they can be. If she had a medical problem...heart attack, diabetes she would have no choice at all but to deal with it. maybe mention the forum....maybe that might at least allow her to get some relief from her symptoms and then she wouldn't feel so bad. I hope it works out.

HI and welcome,

Try explaining that in order to get over her fear that she has to face it, running just makes the fear bigger. It allows the fear to take hold. Fear is just that, fear. It can't kill her. It feels like shit for awhile, but it will get better.

The fact that she can't read forums is probably because it triggered her. Which means it's working.

If everything you do fails, at least you have tried. She needs to want to get better, you can't do it for her, all you can offer is friendship, support, and the tools to get there, she needs to do the work.