Hello everyone.

I was dx'd with PTSD several years ago. I underwent several months of EMDR which, while serving to help with memories and somewhat with
numbness & dissociation, did little (in the long run) for the basic symptoms that seem to be my default way of living (always somewhat disengaged/removed from things, consistently anxious, etc) and the escalation of symptoms under stress.

From December until March I was in....I guess "meltdown". The counselor I am seeing finally persuaded me to try medication to stop the spin-out which, by that time, was so driven by survival that nothing I tried was working. The medication (Zoloft & Wellbutrin) has helped immeasurably.

I have to say that I've lost a lot of confidence in my ability to handle things, my ability to heal, even just confidence in myself -- my own strength and self-reliance. I've been tooling along for a couple of years working on a method that works well for me, and then SLAM.

Reading posts here, it seems that the idea of completely healing from PTSD may be dependent on many factors. But I'm curious: do you ever get to the point where you can just live? Just enjoy life without all the preoccupation and wariness of what & when symptoms will occur to pull the rug out from under, having to watch what all you take on because stress can trip the trigger and send you zooming up to defcon 1?

I feel as though I'm this high-maintenance, "I'm so fragile" person and I hate it. I don't want to stay on the medication (I consented to 3-6 months). I seem to be unable to do all the things I see other people do - when I try to "dive in" to life and live, I end up falling apart.

I'm going to get the recommended book...great title, because I keep asking myself, "Why, after all this time, can't I get over it already"! But any other suggestions would be much appreciated.

I've tried looking for a support group here in my town, so I'm grateful to have found this forum. It seems to be very positive and focused on healing.

Thanks,
Dylan

Hi Dylan,
Welcome to the forum.
I can relate to your frustration.
I have the book you mentioned, it is excellent.She also has written another book called Trust after Trauma which I'm reading at the moment, another great book.

Hello Dylan,

IMO, It's never to late to welcome someone to the forum, so Welcome Dylan. I do see you around the forum and really hope you're finding the support you need and are looking for.

Have you yet to get your hands on a copy of "I Can't Get Over It," and begun reading it?

I haven't yet. Went looking for it at one point, couldn't find it and refuse to pay for yet another book that for right now, I have no time to read. Besides, my ability to see and my concentration comes and goes; And, unfortunately, though I've enjoyed it's return, both are still yet gone more often than they are available. But, I do still have hope that this will improve.

Dylan, ...See you around, and please take care. ....


Hope

Welcome to the forum

Not late in posting Welcome 'cos I am a newbie. But Welcome. A question you asked about getting back to living life (etc,) i'll give a quick reply. Friends away from this forum who are diagnosed with PTSD, have told me that their lives have had a turn around for the better. A lot of work, a lot love and support AND the path improves. I hope that you are finding this as well.

I get not wanted to purchase yet another self help book. I found a copy at my local city Library. I started reading it but didn't get far. I was too afraid to. What if I fall to pieces once I start reading it? I can't afford to. I know, what a cop out...but it's just me and the kids right now so if I fall apart at the seams rent doesn't get paid, food doesn't get purchased, etc...I need to work.
Anyway, I digress...go to the library, it's free and you can keep it for as long as you want.