Hi Melody, welcome to the forum. Well melody, lets not waste any time here, and let me show you some reasoning you can think about in regard to your trauma, and the way you now react in life.
The good thing here, is as you already worked out for yourself about doctors, is that their twits, and they have diagnosed you incorrectly, because they have given you a double diagnosis. The diagnosis of PTSD, already encompasses depression within it. Doctors know this, but they brand you uniquely so the don't have to explain why they need to treat you with multiple medications, hence get their quota of prescriptions and pharmaceutical kickbacks for increasing the wealth. Read this thread about PTSD multiple diagnosis labelling, and this will answer most of your questions in this regard. The majority of doctors are twits, though some do really care about their patients enough to be sensible with them.
Now, do you think the police were just being lazy here? I do. I think they just thought to themselves, "well... no gun, nobody hurt that they could see, lets not worry about it and move on!" Whether you have a weapon or not on your person, if you threaten you do / threaten to use a weapon, whether you show it or not, the person/s on the receiving end still have the same intense fear, as you now have PTSD from that fear.

It is like a person going into a service station with their hand in their pocket, making it look as though a gun is in there, getting money or goods, then leaving. Whether a gun exists or not, the person is not charged with robbery, they are charged with armed robbery. This should have been no difference, hence why I believe the police where just being lazy with this callout.
Well, your wait is over melody... because we can help you move past PTSD if you want too. If you don't, then nothing we say or do to support / guide you will make a difference.
Yes, your thoughts are correct, and once again, the therapists / doctors are idiots with no idea or concept of what feelings we have with PTSD. If its not in a text book, they can't comprehend it. Absolute idiots. The best therapists / physicians for PTSD, could only be one's with PTSD IMHO. But they are about as rare as rocking horse shit.
Standard physician nonsense... lived it myself, know better now.
Melody, your asking for something that can only be confirmed by meeting the attacker. Honestly, from what you described, he was going through a very depressive state within his life, and when in that state, his actions are not always reflective of the person behind them. This means, that instead of trying to convince yourself that he has forgotten about you, he could actually have PTSD now himself, from the guilt he may now carry if he realized what he had done. He may, he may not realise that impact and/or carry that guilt with him.

You see, from the state of mind he was in from his personal situations, it had nothing to do with you personally melody, it was only the fact that you happen to be the person he met first. It wasn't personal, he was most likely frightened also... This doesn't defend his actions, or condone them, because he was in control to some point of himself, though he has a temporary mental relapse that was also involved most likely, thus he was partially in control, and the mental breakdown was partially in control.

He may be sitting there now curled up in a corner with PTSD because he has realised what he did, even though he got away with it. He may have no guilt or remorse what so ever, and be living his life like nothing happened. At the end of the day though, you can't change this, nor can anyone guarantee anything too you. You have to make a choice whether to continue fearing this event, or to heal and move on with your life. It is a choice, and we cannot control what others choose, we can only control our own choices and decisions.
This is normal with what you have endured, and this is the anxiety component of PTSD working at its best. This can be taught and retrained if you want it.

Wouldn't it be lovely if we could just "get over it" or "get past it" and all the other catch phrases thrown around. Unfortunately this is impossible, as you know, though unless people experience PTSD, they cannot truly understand what is going on. However, every aspect of trauma can be healed, even though PTSD will still be present. Once we heal from our trauma, then we just need to learn how to manage our PTSD.

ROFL! Ohhh thank you for that Anthony!! I must remember that I am "as rare as rocking horse shit." That is just priceless!!!

Melody:

It is very nice to meet you. Ditto for everything that Anthony said too. Being threatened is being threatened. You can not read someone's mind and determine if they are full of shit or not. Doctors and police are idiots in this case.

Bec

Hi Melody,

Welcome to the forum! I agree with Anthony regarding the gun thing (and the police being lazy)...(I hate guns...but I guess that comes with living in a war zone)...Anyway, I admire your bravery in talking the guy down...gutsy.

I was once threatened by a distant cousin and some of his friends (we were all kids at the time) with something that looked like a blade...probably wasn't...it was "pointy" (can't think of a better term) but probably dull but he held it at my throat and I remember that I was scared sh*tless...I don't remember much else though. Anyway, I'm glad you found this forum. Take care.

RD

Hi melody. Welcome to the forum. I hope you find that you are among friends. feel freet to vent anytime.

You guys are making me cry happy tears because you actually get it. And yes I want help, that's why I'm here. I want to heal and move forward, just not sure how... Although for the first time in a year and a half, I believe I have found people that can help me and I want to thank you for that!

Welcome to the forum Melody.

hello melody, i've just found us too, feels a relief, doesn't it! i know what you mean about writing it all, but when you start to feel better (and you WILL, i know it's hard to believe now but you WILL!), maybe later, (maybe you'll never want to re-read it), you can read it again, you'll see what a long way you've come & that time etc DOES heal some. try not to get too isolated, try & believe/remember that most people out in that scary world don't want to hurt or scare you, they have problems too & although they might look like they're ok & in control & pretty perfect, very few (any?!) of us, anywhere are, & most of us crave other human contact, however fleeting. hang on in there! all the best.

Thanks beachbum - it most definitely is a relief! I have to keep pinching myself because it seems to good to be true; to have found other people that know EXACTLY how I'm feeling. I look forward to chatting with you!

when i was avoiding everyone & afraid to go out (even now i hate it if somebody walking behind me even though nothing to do with my trauma), i made myself go to the supermarket (had to, needed milk & stuff - weird, i was floating round it sort of in a dream) but just that 2 minute chat with the checkout girl reminded me i was human, it didn't matter what she thought of me, but i learnt that it made ME feel good to try & brighten HER/HIS day and make them smile with something i'd said. also kept my smile in practice this way. hard to explain how good i felt when i'd done it, gone out AND made a fleeting connection with another human being (however superficial). on a good day, try it!

Thank you so much for your welcome, I am finding it hard to respond to everyone (have no idea how Anthony does it), but I'm trying.hey darkskies,
I was reading back through the responses I got and wanted to respond to yours.
How do you do it? How do you get through each day knowing that the person that threatened your life, could be near by?
Shit! As much as I'm happy I've finally found people that feel like me, I don't want to trigger anything! I know how hard it must be for you, because I know how hard it is for me... I was just wondering if you have any advice.