Veiled loved your joke of the day/song lyrics. Think you put them in the right spot.
Meds are working really well right now. Hubs is having a crash day sleep wise. He always feels guilty if he is resting, thinks something is seriously wrong nd starts to panick. Total wokaholic.

We helped a friend move today which felt really good as this person is quite a loner and a very nice, and quiet. As soon as we got home both of us fell asleep for much of the afternoon. Had to reassure hubs his body is telling him to rest as the negative stress for both of us from outsiders had not been too bad at all this week.
Body's way of recouperating I have always believed. I even started sleeping nights since going back to work. Body is so weak right now and my legs are killing me as my job entails walking all the time I am at work. I am on permanent modified duties and back up for two QA jobs. I am glad I quit as a union steward in some ways, not so glad in others. Still help when I can and I havn't decided yet if I should run for reelection when it comes up. People are disappointed I have quit I have told them my health must come first at this time.
I know I will build back up my muscle and body weight now that my apetite has come back. (mind you I don't mind having a flat belly at the moment) won't last long I love healthy food too much. Hope it lasts through the month.
Growing our own meat and poultry, eggs really makes a difference taste and health wise.(no steriods, med free). Hubs is making sure I am getting out so the agraphobia is getting less. Still a little paranoid, scared of interacting with people, If hubs is there I am fine, alone I am not yet. Something I will have to tackle, definately a life long PTSD issue I need help with.
No urges to drink as things going well. Only binge when really upset and know and will fight the urge next time it comes up.

Nice to see Anthony is getting back to health, His comments on the trauma diary to my story already have me thinking hard. Memory lapses are diminishing. Still having "feeling" flashbacks and connecting the dots to memories but then again I've always been a scatterbrain. Will do my best to keep up and overcome.

Sorry to here of Marlene's family's current situation, I am here for her and I know you guys are too.

have a good night all I am off to play with kittens.
I have been thinkng of posting some pics through my web site for you guys.
Tell me what you think on this.
Joannag

Glad you had a good day!!!! You deserved it. ((((hugs))))

JoannaG,

You are right about the home grown food if you have the space to do it. I got breeders for guinea, geese, and turkeys this past year. Will be growing my own for the table come Spring. I have 98 (2died in shipping) broiler chicks in the brooder right now only a few days old. Normally hatch my own chickens but too worn out to bother before they took a break laying. And been doing ducks... I have a bunch of cochins and silkies that love to set so no problems, I keep screwing up my duck eggs in the incubator so they can hatch for me. Also did an order a while back for some layers that should start laying in December at the same time these chicks should be ready for the freezer. Will be nice in Winter. Just need to go hook up my lamp for the layers to trick them into laying if they don't start up as planned...

Have fun with it! Animals are very important here and spoiled.

It is so easy to talk about animals. It is stress relief in so many ways.
Yesterday my dog killed one of our turkeys. Not his fault as hubs was teasing him, with the turkey an hour before. Had bigfire and I am totally scewed up mentally right now. :fart-face Back in my room and ready to stay here forever at this moment in time. Farm life is so easy to dismiss in others eyes.
Had people here yesterday and got ditched with bunch of drunks by hubs.
Had friend over and told I am spreading my legs for everybody. Can't do it.
PTSD is all sex oriented and I just can't after f@@@in big sack of shit is here.
Sorry venting. ranting.................
Am ready to quit job and stay home forever at this moment.

Bye the way veil. I lived a year in Panama city Florida for a year. My first fling was from Birmingham Alabama. Long ago. Had three military bases surronding city. Airforce, Navy, and Army. Glad I came back home to Canada. where I can look at my animals day to day

It is so easy to want to give up at times, I had a break down today when I had to go to the scool to deal wuth my girl's sexual harrasment by antother teen... TWICE Hubs aid he could see it happeing. And we are far from done.

I have had to just edit the last paragraph 100x... shakning and just woke up from it as I collaosed running into walls coming home and falling. So excuse the typos as it hard to type like this and give up trying to fix it. I have extremes agoraphobia so it was hard. So is being in a tight room with those people just had me :dummy-spi with me alternating in fits.

Since the animals relax you... talk to me about them, relaxing for me too. Distaraction is a great way to cope. Teach me a thing or two. I have a hobby farn but more like a mini ranch as anything I grow and tend I kill, I ignore or little one spills seeds... best growth and actual growth! I have luck with critters. I could kill a tumble weed.

I had a turkey that when cleaned was chicken sized, it was still young. It was an accident. My guard dog did not have a food bowl full in the home. So when the LGDs were fed she went over there. While the turkeys steal the food my LGDs they don't push it, just look depressed, my house dog thinks no way, I am alpha as far as animals and bit her neck, She hit her just rigth so I just hung her to bleed out (I bleed all mine) as no saving her. My fault, if she had food in the home she would have been fine before letting her out. The one and only incident I had with her in her 4 years with me. Now my LGDs were a pain in the ass during training and ate any bird who went over to their side of the fence during the triaing/puppy phase.

What breeds do you raise of what animals that you have, Like the Turkeys for example? Any silly sories? They are a breath of fresh air, animals aren't like people so it helps so much. My silly turkey story... bad rains came when they were wee poults. I had to gather up bodies, baby turkeys sit around trying to figure out how can I kill myself today I swear. One I saw blink in the bag barely, "knew"" it was dead, but it was still barely there. I was being soaked and shoved it in my bra between the "girls" to heat it up and finished working in the rain. Save it and it is stunning now, the ones I have are Burbon Reds, and I really want Royal Palms to have around and so sweet, huge but sweet, they jump the fence and steal the cat food every morning, high cat food bill. They also love to get on the roof of the garage and peek in my sons' bedroom windows. They love attention.

If anything, if the calm you they can help ground you.

My dog killed his first turkey this weekend. Hubs fault as he teased dog for at least an hour. Could of evised it. Hubs pissed off threw it in the fire. Then left after beating the dog. Just plain wierd. Cat food bill high here too as kittens crawl and depend on me. Have been banned from barn. Since shoulder is ****ed. It is complete mess over there at moment. Have done sheep, goats, cows, poutry. This year had fox family invading barn. Lost ten ducks, dont know how many chickens. Goat farm up road trying to pawn off all sick billy's at moment.
I said NO

The Great Pyerennes are wonderful animal control for things like fox and coons and so on... I have yet to loose an animal to any predators except the occasional hawk. But the guineas I have now are great at sounding off and every one takes cover... even from planes LOL. But what cracks me up is the Pyrs will chase across the fields after planes and hawks and vultures. They know what birds or OK and which not. A lot of time goes into training them but they will protect any form of livestock and look like they are doing nothing at all, but they seem to always have an eye open. They have to be kept outdoors at all times and not "family" so they bond with the animals they protect and not you, or they can end up worthless as a LGD.

This is a shot of some ducks used to own before switching breeds... The LGDs make it possible for them to do this out in the yard on their own.

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Thanks veiled. Your pic feels like spring again. unfortunately none of my ducklings made it this year. Have lots of pics Have to figure out how to post here yet. Not a good morn for me here. Day two off work with no call in. One more and I am fired. Can't bear to leave my room at moment, hubs at me again today and just don't have it in me to fight anymore. Safe here for the moment. :crazy-eye
Right now it is my kittens keepin me on the planet and you caring people of course. Don't care about the job anymore. 25000 less if I quit, get fired. Ready to relocate anyway. Just don't know where yet. My son is in jail because of local idiots and I must take care of him. I miss my boys so much.
He (boy in jail) is fairing better than me.
Yes it is sex oriented too.