Hello!

Call me whisky, everyone does. I am a 43 year old single female. I am a survivor of life-long physical, emotional and verbal abuse by my parents and two of my brothers. I only got out for good three years ago. Yes, they did whatever they could to keep me in that house. I escaped.

I am out, but I am indigent and on the edge of becoming homeless. I have huge gaps in my life-skills. I have almost no ability to do basic arithmatic. I am phobic of men (no offense, guys -- I don't believe men are evil or hate them) and this makes it difficult to impossible to find gainful employment. As I am estranged from my family and I have few friends, I have no real support network. I live every moment afraid I am going to end up homeless, or sick and dying alone.

I am getting counseling and treatment, but I know it takes time. I have applied for disability, and that takes a long time. Meanwhile, I am scrambling to survive, and still be patient. I think that is the hardest part, waiting for things to move, the things that can help me, that can take pressure off.

I do have joy in my life. I am an artist, and creating brings me happiness. I do hear from distant friends regularly. And I have a large, healthy sense of humor and appreciation for the absurd! :crazy-eye

So, I am here. Being here is part of my efforts to heal. I believe I can recover, which is to say, I can overcome all that has happened and have a happy life. I am not sick, I am injured. Injuries can heal, and I am determined to be whole, just as I was when I was born.

Meanwhile, if I can listen and help someone else, I will.

Greetings! :D

Hi Whiskey, welcome along and glad you joined. Yep, childhood and ongoing abuse against females.... it just never ends really I guess. I don't know exactly what females must do on this earth in order for males to treat them equally, but geez I honestly hope it comes along soon, to stop all this bullshit going into our next generations as it is now. There is no shortage of people here who have been abused as a child and into adolescense, thats for sure.

Whiskey, why do you believe your going to end up homeless, sick and dye alone?

welcome, whiskey. glad you're able to get the counseling that you need. hope you get those other problems taken care of soon. anything involving gov. takes forever.
cathy

Hi WTF
giggles and hugs lots.

It takes strength to leave a bad place, and even more to heal. From what you have said, You have that strength to heal.

Oh, and I would love to see some of your artwork, if you feel like sharing.
GR'ass aka cass

Whiskey. I am glad that you are here! How wonderful it is to be an artist. Does it help with the pain? I am a dabbling artist and the expressive art therapy I was able to do in oupatient really safed a shaky part of myself. Now I have all these pieces around the house I don't know what to do with! :)

I too am a survivor of physical, emotional, and sexual abuse.

I am glad that you have joy in your life. How wonderful to be able to say share that with us.

You have a REAL support system here!!!!!

Welcome!

Well, hello artist friend! I'm glad you've found us.

Welcome whisky,

An appreciation of the absurd and a determination to be whole. That's awesome!

I'm glad you got out of a bad place. And that you still have joy.

It's going to take fathers setting the example to their sons of not hitting women or people smaller and weaker. To teach them it doesn't make them a man to hurt someone/thing that can't defend itself. It makes them pathetic. What the kids see in the first few years sets the pattern for life. I taught for nine years and some of the shit that parents did to their children in the name of love and discipline would turn your stomach and I just knew it was going to be passed onto the next generation. It was one of the reasons I quit teaching.
*getting off of soapbox now*

That is extremely good information Marlene, and thank you for shareing your experience with us. I don't actually know anyone personally who hits women here... because if I did, I would hit them so they can see how it feels. Whilst it is a problem everywhere, I believe some cultures and societies are worse than others for women still not being allowed their independance, rights and general humanity. The world is just fu*ked up in too many ways....

Pets Anthony

Any we are all trying to put our bit of it back together again.

WTF, welcome to the group! I hope you find lots of useful tools and a safe / creative outlet for this journey we all share.
:walking: