Violence and traumatic events are all i've ever known (since i was 11 years old until about 4 years ago), and then my wife died 2 years ago this week, and i was the one that found her dead of an overdose of pills and an illegal narcotic. But, it seems as though i've either been the recipient of or witness to violence my whole life with two major life and death traumas!! i'm fairly sure that i know which minor trauma started the PTSD rolling, but the 8 gang members beating me half to death was probably the major event that kicked my PTSD into what it is today for i remember a point during the beating where i just accepted the fact that i was going to die that day... fortunately, i got away!! That was 3-4 years ago, and that is when the major symptoms started and haven't stopped since. I think that i might actually be starting to figure some things out (a little bit at a time)I am going to post this in the forum for i feel that it is a major revelation about my PTSD and how it started!!

Josh

Keep up the good work!

Ain't it kinda like the "Light Bulb" going off. I feel so good when I have just a little revalation about myself.
Kudo's Josh

keep working, josh, you're getting there!

thank you everyone!! i know it probably doesn't sound like a big deal, but i'm finally STARTING to make SOME sense of my PTSD; and that's a big thing to me!! thanks, again for listening everyone!!

Josh

Every step, every realization.... it's all a BIG DEAL!!!!!!!!!

We all know how big a deal it is, now don't down talk yourself... You did good and you deserve to be happy about that! Every little step deserves your own little party, do something good for yourself.