Jade,
I'm sorry you suffered so much because of crap movies that kids should not be allowed to watch, the death of your beloved pet. I refuse to watch crap movies and never allow my daughter when she was little to watch stuff like that. Unfortunately for her we care took a ranch, animals, some of which she cared for died, generally not of trauma, but of illness. It still isn't pretty. Now she is grown & an EMT. I taught her to talk about issues, to ask for hugs whenever she felt she needed them. You are a worthy person, many people are not. Look up and around you, if you can't look them in the eye like Anthony said. It's a start. Watch their body language. Some people talk with their hands, maybe using their whole body. Check out their mouth.. maybe it has a smile and you can then share it...if they don't have a smile, inmagine them with Mickey Mouse ears or something, so you can smile... Try not to let others intimidate you, tho sometimes that may not be easy.
Hang in there...Some people can send hugs with their eyes... Many can show you many emotions that are good, helpful, loving, funny and many more... not all are bad..

take care and enjoy your holiday season

Yes that's me too. I used to have really good eye contact actually, to the point where some other people would get uncomfortable, because I could stare them down basically. But since the trauma I don't look at anyone at all hardly. I usually look at the ground or sideways, without looking up at all. My family has been trying to get me to look them in the eye, but I find it very difficult, to the point of panicking.

I'm an eye contact person. I know why hubby struggles to do this at the moment with me. I tell him if he can just pick a freckle on my face (many to choose from, lol) & look at that instead.

I hate giving eye contact. I tend to fake it, focus on either peoples mouths or their chests.

I do however, when wearing sunglasses, tend to stare at people. I hate making eye contact, even (or rather especially) with family.

Jade, try this one then to help you begin building some self esteem and confidence once again; Positive Affirmations Utilising Your Partner, Family or Friend.

Cannot hold eye contact with family for more than a second or two. Enough to look at them but not long enough for a reaction. Still too much fear of seein disappointment, anger, now i'm even adding in pity.
I did look at my self yesterday in a mirror. Just my face but I actually really looked at the image staring back at me. Not quite ready to look at the rest of my self yet.
No I did not like what I saw. My first though was when the hell did I get so old? I know that is my image looking back at me but it was more like looking at an empty shell. There is no life in my eyes no inkling that there is life inside. Qutie honestly it was looking at myself post-mortum. Reminder of why I don't look in the mirror?

Lisa, that will change. There is a post a while back of me saying I did not know who that was in the mirror as it sure as hell was not me! It gets better I can certainly say.

And my ex... That asshole. He said the eye contact thing was a cop thing (do not listen to his advice again asshole). If a guy could or would hold your stare he was up to no good or a cop. He said normal people look away. I got into a habit briefly of seeing if people would hold my stare or look away. The ones that held it... Total creep out mode. Certainly a confidence thing.

Growing up with my dad eye contact was a form of disrespect and retaliation. To look my dad in the eye meant you were trying to defend yourself and that was a no, no, . Just a harsher punishment. With him it was either his way or no way at all.

sign of submission on the most primitave level...

Could you explain this to me? It seems as if my brain isn't awake right now. Just need a nudge. Thanks.