WARNING: If you plan on submitting your own mental imagery interview for assessment, DO NOT read the proceeding first, instead fill out your own interview first, then read these, so your current mental image is not skewed, resulting in a possible inaccurate emotional state being returned to you.

This is an imaginery journey down a road. Take in the sights, sounds and colours, just like a video camera recording all that lies surrounding you. Survey the scene, noticing whatis far off in the distance, the background surrounds, the weather, the season and a total image of what you view. Feel the ground beneath your feet. Try to visualize it as a picture on a canvas, but with movement, sound, colour and emotion. You are the surveyor on this journey. Draw your journey on paper if you desire, as it often shows clearer results, then attach your drawing via snapshot or scan to your post.

Q1. What colour is the road? red
Q2. What texture is the road? sandy
Q3. How solid is the road? packed earth

You continue walking and come to a river that must be crossed. There before you is the river; the size and depth are up to you. You cannot go around it but must imagine a way to cross it. Whatever you need to cross the river is already within your mind, just imagine seeing yourself do it.

Q4. How do you cross the river? construct a bridge
Q5. What does the water look like? clear
Q6. How fast is the water current? very fast
Q7. Is there anything in the water? If so, what? pike (fish), frogs, stones

You have crossed the river and continue walking. You come to a house. Take a good look at the house. Notice the impression it makes on you.

Q8. What colour is the house? red - resembles a log cabin
Q9. What condition is the house in? >5 yrs old
Q10. Does anyone live in the house? If so, who? someone who does not seem to want me there.

We continue forward in our minds journey and come to an open field. A cup is on the ground, and we stop to examine it. The cup can be of any size, shape, colour and description. Focus on it's look, condition and contents.

Q11. What colour is the cup? blue and jewel-encrusted
Q12. What condition is the cup in? battered
Q13. Is there anything in the cup? If so, what? no

You continue walking down the road and come to something blocking your path. It stops you in your tracks and prevents you from going forward. This is an obstacle.

Q14. What is the obstacle, and please describe it in detail? wall of logs
Q15. What do you see beyond the obstacle? nothing

Now you have had a break, go back to every question and look at your response. Try and find what you feel that your mind presented the image it did. Explain colours you chose, textures, water, cup, solids, liquids, space, objects, people, anything and everything that you wrote from your projected image, try and find what you feel to why you have that image. Don't look hard at things, instead try and look for the easy answers, as they are often the correct one's. Don't attempt to find something that isn't present, just look at each aspect for its absolute simplicity.

This is not an absolute, but something you must do in order to try and self analyse yourself. This is important. Please answer what you can, and simply define if you cannot find an emotion to a response you gave.

1. The road is red because it is made of red clay, like that found in North Carolina. I prefer this type to soil aesthetically to all others.
2. I chose sandy as the descriptive word for the road's texture because the road is not too loose, not too packed.
3. The road is solid enough to walk on; packed-in earth.

4. The bridge - that's my inner engineer at work; I thought of all those shows that I've watched about the classical civilizations and how they cross expanses of water -- they build bridges. Then attack the defending city.
5. I can see right through to the bottom of the water. I prefer clear bodies of water; I want to see what's down there.
6. The current is rushing by, and the animals that are down there are struggling against it, or going with it.
7. The water has life in it; being the naturalist that I am, I can't imagine water without it. The bottom has an expanse of sand and stones, whirring with the current.

8. The house looks like a log cabin made of redwood. I like log cabins.
9. The cabin looks new, but it isn't brand new. Someone lives in it, but they didn't just move in. They had to been there for a few years.
10. The occupants don't seem very welcome. I wave and say hello, but I get no response from the people on the front porch. All they do is stare at me as if to say, "Why are you here? Go away." So I go.

11. What the holy grail must look like from a distance. Everything looks better from a distance.
12. The cup is very old, and it has travelled. It looks well-used. It's abandoned.
13. If there was something in the cup, it evaporated or was emptied a long time before I got there.

14. The obstacle is wooden, solid, and causes splinters. Splinters, splinters, splinters! I can't go around it. I'll have to touch it. And get those splinters.
15. I can't see over or around the wall. It just stands there, mocking me.

Life

Whilst you feel excitement about aspects of your life, you view life as being emotionally challenged, possibly caused from an unstable or dangerous family environment / past environment. Love may be an unknown commodity within your life from possible past family abuse.

Sexual Relationships

You demonstrate a marked inhibition towards trusting others. You enjoy sexual interaction with excitement and impulsiveness, though most likely approach sexual relationships without control, but instead under the control of others. You have been victimized within past sexual relationships, comprising abuse or neglect, thus making it quite difficult for you to now give or take love.

Support System

You demonstrate an average self esteem, and whilst you feel your support system is adequate, you likely garnish more support from friends and associates than that of possibly family. You feel quite abandoned to cope with your problems from those who matter most in life. This feeling is not new and has been present for some years.

Commitment

You value commitment with high regard and feel you're progressing towards healing past pain, you feel a victim to past commitment, abandoned by others lack off commitment, let down so to speak. You demonstrate no commitment towards anyone or anything else in your life at present (if single) (if partner - no commitment towards anything or anyone other than your partner).

Most Significant Problem

Life has shown you a lack of appreciation, or depreciated even, where you lock your feelings inside, though you are very aware of this problem. You remain scared to release your emotions from fear of the pain it will inflict upon you. Your hidden emotions are blocking your view of what life has waiting for you.

Tabitha, where does this relate in your life?

It's all true. Every word.:brrr:

In what way? What do you connect to what is said Tabitha?

The analysis describes my sense of isolation from everyone and everything.
I feel frozen when it comes to emotion and expressing it. Every time I go to express my feelings I either cannot control the expression and it comes out more negative than I intended or I freeze it in its tracks.

They frighten me, my emotions. I don't like feeling like I'm not in control of them. I don't like not being in control of myself. I can't even cry when I'm alone.

Do you see fearing your emotions as helping you, or hindering you?

I see it as hinderance, actually. I don't like fearing my feelings. I want to be able to express them honestly without feeling like I'm whining or burdening the world.

It seems that others in my family are allowed to express their feelings but when I do, I'm being too negative, or selfish, or "acting like a baby"...the occupational hazard of being the youngest.

And forget crying. That's scotched right away.

Tabitha, whilst we here are not that support system you need most, being your family, sometimes we must help ourselves beyond what we fail to get from our families, needed support and trust. I know you have not really opened up here, privately and publicly, and this is certainly not doing you any favours, to say the least. You are aware this is not doing you any favours, as outlined above.

Tabitha, you must allow yourself to let go and just let it all out. Emotions come from us looking at our pain, not from hiding it inside where we can't really look at it. The medium is here for you Tabitha when you are ready, to release all that is inside you, where you are not judged, you are not whining, you are not burdening us here. We all know Tabitha because we all feel and have travelled the exact path you are, nothing is new to most here. This is why we must force ourselves to open pandoras box within us, allow our emotional outlet to function, allow our overflow to work the way it should, instead of continually suppressing and clamping our emotional taught within. To release is to let go. To let go is to look deeper at our feelings. To look deeper at our feelings is to help understand our pain. To help understand our pain is to help heal us. To heal is to live life once again.

It takes time for me to open up to people. I either want to do it all at once, or I don't want to at all.

What's in here is scary; that's why I keep me locked away. I'm always afraid that I'll frighten people away.

***After thinking some more:
It's the intensity of my emotional expression that scares others. Hell, it frightens me.