Nuggets Mental Imagery - Page 2

nugget · #11 10-01-2007, 03:23 PM

As much as i think about it or not i can only come up with that people wont believe me regarding the suicide there wernt any witnesses i had to rely on the road evedence and the police findings. And my PTSD symptoms i fear that people cant see whats wrong with me they think im lying.

anthony · #12 10-01-2007, 08:05 PM

Rob, why does it matter what other people think? Plenty of things go on in this world mate that rely on only one persons statement, no witnesses. It doesn't make you a liar Rob because someone stepped out in front of your truck to commit suicide and nobody saw it directly. Lets look at the facts Rob:

# What does the police report outline about the incident Rob?
# Did the police breath test you? If so, what was the result?
# Did the police drug test you? If so, what was the result?
# Had you slept correctly with the allocated hours before driving?

nugget · #13 12-01-2007, 01:01 PM

You got me on all four questions,
The police report stated that id did all possible to avoid that i could have done
Yep was put on the bag. Neg reading
Tox report came back clean
I was a little over on my times nearly half an hour but the police said i had gone threw enough shit that they wouldnt worry about that.

I know in my heart whats right i have trouble connecting that message with the brain. It took over a year to obtain my letter that fully put me in the clear i had spent over a year thinking i was going to sped the next 15plus years locked up. Its hard to think straight when its yourself up against a bloke thats been hit buy a truck not much left of him if you get my drift i am working on this with my psychologist he reckons the time frame from the day of my accident till the letter only made my symptoms persist instead of being one trauma to deal with it had turned into many.

anthony · #14 13-01-2007, 01:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nugget

You got me on all four questions

Good, now memorize them Rob.

The police report stated that I did all possible to avoid that i could have done
Negative breathe reading
Negative drug reading
I was a little over on my times nearly half an hour but the police said i had gone threw enough shit that they wouldnt worry about that.

Quote:

Originally Posted by nugget

It took over a year to obtain my letter that fully put me in the clear i had spent over a year thinking i was going to sped the next 15plus years locked up... ...my psychologist reckons the time frame from the day of my accident till the letter only made my symptoms persist instead of being one trauma to deal with it had turned into many.

I would agree with your psychologist Rob. For one year your brain constantly replayed the incident, looking to find confirmations whether you where at fault or not, and your admission by negation here: You thought you where going to jail for 15 years even though you knew you had done nothing wrong. That thought alone has caused you a full year of grief, and now continues to haunt you. Whilst you find relief knowing you have been officially cleared, the damage that thought caused is now done, and now you must undo it as such by finding the logical reasoning, but accepting the facts as beliefs, not just thoughts.

nugget · #15 13-01-2007, 04:06 PM

Thanks Anthony I thought it would be a simple matter of once i received my letter from the police things would click but now i know it goes deeper their were a few more hick ups with this matter. One was in the media report they reported that i was the one killed. Its very strange to see your name being reported as dead, even the police have admitted they stuffed up my case all these things just seemed to drag and make life hell it took over a year till i was given written confirmation that i was all clear i suppose it takes a few months till it sinks into the grey matter. Thanks once again Rob

anthony · #16 13-01-2007, 04:20 PM

Rob, that year of mental torment, I would even go as far as saying torture, will take just as long to undo now, if not longer, but definately the starting point is to know what is fact, what is not (your mind making shit up for you) and assimilating all the fact into your brain to overpower the fiction (myth), so that your mind can begin the process of knowing what is, and is not, factually correct. This will cease a lot of your symptoms alone, though you still have some other trauma pre-existing that was undealt...

Sounds easy, but to be honest, it is the toughest damn thing your ever going to do mate. Facing our past head on is the only way past this Rob, and I know you have it in you. Life is waiting you mate...

nugget · #17 14-01-2007, 09:03 AM

Cheers mate i have found trying to move ahead in big steps only makes me fall flat on my face so its just little steps forward and i seem to be making progress. Exposure therapy has helped me to no end but shit i dont think anybody can ready you for it, it shattered me at the start but i am now reaping the rewards of all the pain. (1 down about 20 to go)

anthony · #18 15-01-2007, 07:41 PM

Yer mate, it does take time, but its all worth it in the end. We all rush into things, especially us blokes, thinking we can conquer it all ASAP, to only learn it will take a good year or more when we really start to hit things, not pussy foot around them. Your doing great mate, and now doing more to help yourself than ever before. Keep it up buddy...