The last week has been trying to say the least... My wife was fired from her job unfairly and this has shattered her self esteem, which was shaky at best. I can't seem to be able to build her up... Lost my Mom last week and don't have the objectivity that I had. We all have issues in our lives and when I have to deal with my own it seems that I have none left for her. I have not been around to be of much help because the dieing process for Mom took alot of what time and energy I had...The natural depression of losing someone so close has made me unable to help her. I need some prayer and I needed to be able to talk to some one objective. It's amost as though I'm being punished for not paying attention to her. The kids are no help, being in the snotty teen years. They have been part of the problem in stead of helping. I'm about ready to slap the shit out of some backtalkers, but, what good would that do?
It dosn't help matters that about 6mo. ago I had to have 4 way bypass. Seems that I have been fighting the blues ever since.. Man am I tired...
Wayne

wayne,

Try to hang in there, hope yr health is improving. Sorry to hear about yr mom. Yr wife may just need some time. Maybe some help from a friend or a mental health in yr area.

If u love each other and are willing to work at it hang in there.....

Hugs to both of you...

D (wildcritter)

Wayne, other than your name and your quad bypass, I would swear that you're really my husband incognito.. Identical!! I was fired unfairly from my job (damn PTSD) that was last april, my husband's mother suddenly passed away in july.. constant turmoil in household with blended family/teenagers or some who still think they're teenagers. You have so much going on in your head and heart, with your mom, wife, kids, etc.. its hard to do it. Your wife has her own tangled blob that she's trying to work through. Self esteem after losing a job is big.. I feel like three quarters of who I was , was my job. Now thats been taken away from me. I feel worthless. My poor husband is suffering too, his mom is all he had since his dad died when he was 17. I feel unable to help support him when I'm so screwed up myself. This forum is at least a start, we all understand what you're both going through.. please continue to talk to us.. it helps get through each day.. and even though you're probably not really my husband under cover, you're loved, more than you probably know.

vcc and wild critter,
It's passing strange how so much of this is so wide spread. I'm just a Missouri boy who has had to learn a lot more about this disorder than I would have ever imagined. When my sweety had her first crash, and was hospitalinzed I thought, just how are you going to deal with this ? To me knowledge is power, and if I was going to be part of her healing I had better get to studying! I still get bamboozled by the effects sometimes, but we must be doing something right, because her crashes are less severe and she bounces back quicker. When a new stressor comes, that is when she has the hardest time. This woman is no weakling, though. She never ceases to amaze me with her inner strength. She, as many of the sufferers on this forum do, have no idea of the true strength they posess! The old saying" if it don't kill you it will make you stronger" has alot of truth when it comes to PTSD.
As for this thread, sometimes I get alitlle down when I get too tired, and when she is having a hard time. I kinda hit bottom myself with Mom passing.
It's very comforting to know that I can come here and be understood. Out in the world, no one wants to hear about bad things...They might have to get emotionaly involved. I know that to heal one needs to talk. That interplay is esential to healing. Thankyou all for listening.

Wayne

I'm a sufferrer, and I just wanted to say that I've been reading some of your posts and you sound like a wonderfully supportive and understanding spouse! It just warms me up reading how you work with your wife to help her heal. Give yourself a big pat on the back for that.

bec

I hope to encourage other spouses with the experiences that I have had. Thankyou for your concern, Bec!

Wayne

I hope you encourage them too. I'm sorry to hear about your mom. (I'm always at a loss of what to say in situations like this) Remember to take care of yourself too, it's important.

bec

Wayne.. remember what I said about my incognito husband? I told him about you.. I want him to talk to you, I really think you could help each other.. there are such similarities, its uncanny.. He's at work now.. but he'll get here as soon as he can. (I'm hopeful too that it helps you both, I feel like I'm so screwed up, I dont know what to do for him) Thanks for being here.. :biggrin:

vcc,
I sure would try my best to help... Sounds like we sure have something in common.

Wayne
PS sometimes Im not on here for a couple of days at a time. Ill try to be on more often.wws