I awoke this morning to find the kitchen in a mess there were two coffee cups half filled with and coffee, coffee and milk spilled all over the cupboards all over the floor splash marks all the way to the table. The sugar spoon was in the food cupboard MMM none of us has sugar in our coffee, id left the milk on the table, i had turned all the lights on in the house except the bedrooms. Looks like i tried to clean the toilet while doing a wee there was more on the floor than i gather made it in the toilet. I remember waking from a nightmare but staying in bed all the rest i have no recall a bit scary. In the past few weeks my wife has had to hide our smokes when she goes to bed because i tend to light up a smoke without any knowledge of it. I had the most vivid nightmare about killing the person who caused my accident this morning, i had to open one eye slowly to see if the wife was ok, i am very scared that i will live out my nightmare in real time so most nights i tend to sleep in the lounge.

Ugh. I don't know what to say Rob except I do weird shit too sometimes, and don't remember afterwards. So you're not the only one at least. Take care.

i have people tell me things that i/we talked about, that i have no recollection of. sometimes i don't remember that i've already done a chore, and go to do it again til something jars my memory. makes me feel so old.
cathy

I saw my T last Thursday....He told me that the previous week they had come outside and my van was parked where I usually park it....however I was nowhere to be found.....they came back out 2 hours later and my van was gone.....He asked me where did I go.....I have NO memory of that evening....no idea where I had disappeared to.....SCARY!!!!! All this just has adds to my depression....if I am doing something that I don't even remember means I have really lost it!!!!!:cuckoo: I have been having a lot of experiences of dissassociation....like my brain is not inside my skull but somewhere "out there" [where exactly I cannot explain]....On the way there last week I was 3-fourths the way into an intersection when it suddenly dawned on me that I had not responded to the fact that the light was red and that there was all this traffic around my van....having a floating sense of being disconnected.....My T's jaw just about hit the floor.....I had to promise him to really concentrate at the lights on the way home and call when I got home.....I really think I'm done for....to me this is not quality of life....and what's the point????

WF can understand what you mean and where you are coming from. I found out as the morning progressed that i had let the dog in, moved the mat in the laundry, hid the lid to the Milo tin, let the dog back outside left the back door open the dog must of thought it was his lucky day he dosent come inside. My wife locked the smokes in our filing cabinet i found the keys and the smokes she swears she has never put them in there before. All this while im not aware of whats going on and the real SCARY part is it frighten the shit out of me.

nugget, I have had those moments. I will admit it was on meds normally as an adult teen I was not in control (really bad if I had a drink). My moments now are I will lose a couple days but I do not usually do anything bad, I more or less am depressive, just memory loss. Back when I was violent I had little to no recall. Yes, it is scary as shit. But I do not do it at near as much now and my blackouts are pretty harmless.

But I have to say one thing, when it gets bad you may snap back. And oh lord it involved smoking... I had slipped one night I have no recall except when snapped out and was very dangerous. It was when I could not sleep in my room I had a mattress on the living room floor. It became where I could handle hubs and lil' one come sleep there but it was all I could take and only way I could sleep. My teen had made an ashtray at school. Well it had a hot spot I guess.

See if I was finally out I was out out. But the quilt fell into the tray. my bed caught fire. my carpet was burned I woke to see the mattress on fire grabbing the baby and flipping out on hubs to wake him. They were oblivious that time. I snapped. At a time I would have to rely (or think I would) on him I came to. So I know it is possible when things go bad you can come out of it. Stupid shit we may not recall but if it gets bad enough our brain can kick back in. I saw it. I also saw the big burn as my mattress burned into the grass outside the front door for months!

Blacking out is scary but we do come to at bad points, it can and does happen.

Thanks veiled i have had some bad turns,blackouts but this one really scared me i have normally try to laugh them off but this time it was like a tornado had hit the kitchen. Just another thing to write about, never dull anymore id love a day when nothing happened, till we chat again thanks

Hey nugget, think yourself lucky. When I do that i usually end up burning myself or slicing my thigh.

Really really sucks sometimes.

Have also came to standing in the yard in my underwear in the pouring rain. Not fun.

Rob, do you exercise? If not, give this a try please... each evening, lets say after dinner, go for a short walk, 1km or so, take the missus too if she wants to go, and just relax, take in the surroundings where you walk and chat with the wife. Each day, increase the walk by around 100m until you are walking about 5kms, which would take no longer than an hour at a steady pace. Lets see what this does to your sleeping patterns, because I think you just might find it may stop this dead in its tracks. Now, the next thing, do you take medication before you go to bed? If so, what? If its not essential, take it at other times, ie. middle of the day or when you wakeup, not when you go to bed.

No problems Anthony, wife gave me a dog for that reason hes about at walking stage now, i do normally walk each day or ride my bike. I do take sleeping pills, having funny turns with and without tablets. (Stilnox) when im on tablets i seem to do a few more strange things and i have done some pretty weird shit when i havent taken anything for a week. Jods reckons she can have a full conversation with me and i answer properly but i have no recall of anything that we have talked about.