I guess what has saved me is competency (in software development). But I struggle with conflict of any type and seem to be a target for bullies. Just an email asking me to attend a meeting (I think is unnecessary) will set me off: heart in my throat, shallow rapid breathing, stunned how to respond. Seems like the trigger has something to do with feeling taken advantage of or taken for granted - I'm working through that with my therapist.

I let my boss know in vague terms that I'm going through a 'family crisis' and that I'm 'holding it together'. I haven't told them that it's PTSD. I have huge fears that I will screw up and be out of a job, a home, a place to live.

If I can just do my job without dealing with bullies or conflict, then I am quite well occupied and distracted from how alone I feel. It's weekends that are hard, back in the bubble... feeling so separate from the rest of the world.

I see the T on Monday, it's gonna be a real 'crier' of a session I can just tell...

Well, I've been here more than a year and just seeing this poll has always triggered me, but I finally voted. I'm "resting." But it's more like I can't work. It really hurts. I think I was a workaholic, probably to avoid everything. For almost 20 years, I loved what I did and was good at it, then PTSD hit me several years ago and gradually ate away at my concentration, wellness, productivity, confidence. Too many things triggered me, both at work and outside work. I missed so many days due to emotional sickness . . . intrusive thoughts, flashbacks, haunting nightmares, paralyzation, etc., that it got to the point that a "good" week was when I could put in 10-15 hours. I don't remember how I got through those last months. It was all an agonizing blur. I was relieved when I got laid off. I simply couldn't deal with the stress anymore. I am finally learning to do better without the stress of work - one measurement of this is that I don't go through every day wishing I could check myself into a hospital :)

it affected my job i was ending up in mental heath va hospitals. i had use lots of my sick leave. the postal service had a suppesion for abuse of sick leave. i was close to being fired one more suppesion and i would be toast my thirteen year carrer would be gone and no retirement income. they sent me to their doctor he found me unfit for duty so i have been drawing postal disability since 1994 becase of my ptsd.

i worked 2 and a half years at a zoo but i went very far very fast. i was manageress in a year of the whole place, I was boss of everyone and i had nobody challenging me so i didnt feel threatened.

after this though i struggled to hold down a job because i became aggressive towards anyone who tried to dominate me and order me about and when i became deppressed i just wanted to site at home all the time.

i am un employed at the moment and want to stay that way for a year so i can try recover. i have an interview for a part time (15 hours a week) cleaning job on saturday which i wouldnt mind doing as i will be working alone which i love. i can be my own boss

Yep- throwing up on retail customers is bad. Being late, erratic, spaced out, easily agitated, etc etc etc- all bad. Telling one's boss that you could give a fock- also bad. I've been "resting" for almost 8 full years now. Just got disability- the government says I became disabled in 2005. But they will only pay me for the previous 12 months. (Not that I'm really complaining- anything is better than nothing) They also expect me to live on (drum roll, please) the awesome sum of $658 a month. Good thing I'm creative with finance and have two- lucky me- people who care for me and pay the real bills. I only pay for meds, doctors, therapy, and my psychiatrist. (who doesn't accept medicaid) And then anything left over, I give to my housemates to go toward whatever bills they see fit. I figure, they've been carrying me for many years, paying for me to have a place to live, food, transportation, and doctors etc. The very least I can do is try to pay some of it back. Unless I win the lottery, I will never be able to repay all the people who've helped me while I've been "resting". I hope that someday I'll be able to work again- I really liked what I did. Fingers crossed for luck. red

I teach music to all levels of students. While I have remained employed full time, I don't feel I am able to give to the students as much as I once did. I hope to someday return to the kind of teacher I was, but for now, I guess I do what i have to in order to survive.

I'm involuntarily "resting." I'm in a very high-stress profession, and it just doesn't seem like a good idea to immerse myself in that while suffering from a major stress disorder. But I'd rather be working than dealing with this.

That is me. I have been out since mid March of this year, both for medical and PTSD reasons. My co workers would be treating me so much differently if had some sort of more visible signs of my physical injuries--- if I were wearing casts or neck braces etc... but I digress....

I am voting temporary, temoporarily.....

I am on a dissbility pension from the n.y.c.t.a ,also on workersman compension and social security disability

I am going on on my 27 month with ptsd .Ihave been reading that some are working full time jobs there must be something i am missing . There is know way i can work .There are days i cant even leave the house . So is there different stages of ptsd ? like a 1 to 10 scale . I am om s.s.d. workmans comp/ disability pension .