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Old 22-07-2006, 06:35 PM
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Default Forum Usage, Internet vs. Addiction

The title pretty much explains itself, and what I am about to write in regard to a sufferers best interest vs. another source of addiction.

I haven't written about this until it is now beginning to become a problem, in that some members of the community have stated within their posts that they are sometimes being referred too by partners or family members, as addicted to this forum, or spending too much time online.

The World Wide Web (WWW) is an addictive atmosphere, and this has been documented within studies many times already, even to the point where people willingly give up marriages, family, friends and work to get more of their addiction. The Internet, this forum included, is often used to suppress what is real within a persons life, no different to using alcohol or drugs.

If a spouse, family member or friend (as a third person) is stating your spending too much time online, or upon this forum, then there is a problem. The problem is, is that those people are most likely correct, because their needs are no longer being met, ie. time together. Internet usage, including this forum, needs to be managed individually, so that your effort to regain your life, doesn't also become a means to end other parts of it, ie. marriages, friendships, employment, etc etc.

If you become addicted to this forum or the Internet as a whole, then you are merely creating more problems than repairing. I have walked this line very much myself, and can speak from experience, especially considering a part of my livelihood was based within online marketing, thus I spent conderable time online for work related purposes. The Internet can destroy valuable parts of your life, that are far more important than the Internet could ever return to you. If your secluding yourself to the Internet, you are worstening your ability to get back social skills and enjoyment, whilst also creating another addiction to help suppress your trauma, ie. whilst online I feel good. You could say the same thing as, whilst I drink alcohol, I feel good, or whilst I am stoned, I feel good, all of which are things helping suppress trauma, emotions and reality.

Online time is like anything, and must be used in moderation. Don't think for a second you won't get worse if you become an online junkie, because you will. Spending time online must be controlled, the same as you would anything else within your normal life, ie. shopping, cleaning, socialising, family time, kids time, spouse time, etc etc. If your online to much, chances are you are ignoring other facets of your life.

Again, myself as an example. I limit my time I will spend online, including this forum. I will ensure that my work here does not mess with my childrens time, or responsibilities. Saying that though, my online time is also a necessity for myself, especially the writing here, so it is also part of me, thus must be factored into and accepted by those around me. What they don't have to accept though, is constant time at the computer and no time with them, being quality time.

If your spouse is telling you such things, then maybe you need to listen, talk with them about it, tell them that you need time online for research, chat, help, etc, and comprimise, because thats what life is all about... comprimise. Allocate yourself "x" amount of time to achieve what you need to online, and leave it at that once that time is used each day. Don't allow yourself to accrue time, because that is ineffective, ie. didn't go online today, so I will double up tomorrow. It doesn't work like that.

Don't attempt to fix yourself with another addiction is what I am saying. We all need help, we all need support, however; we all need other more important things to help with our improvement, being family, appointments, social activities, etc etc. I don't want to see people creating an issue to resolve other issues. Think about that, and moderation to everything is the key, especially in relationships, as anyone in relationships should know. Being single is one thing, being married and family environments with children, is another.
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Old 15-01-2007, 04:01 PM
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Appreciate All you've said here, above. I've been working on this, and let's say, it's not easy. Do feel like I'm doing pretty well though. It's just too bad my reading, processing, response and ability to communicate seems just so darn slow to me at times. It takes me much more time, to be actively involved in this forum as I've been presuming it takes all of you. Perhaps, I'm wrong. ......And, I want to be more involved.

Anyhow, I log onto the forum and 3hrs. roll by and I really haven't been able to read as much as I'd like. And, time is precious, and what with my mind wandering, spacing-out, and my compulsivity, I end up feeling like either I've done nothing or accomplished too little. So in my attempt to balance everything in all of life, I figure I'll continue here, juggle, perservere, but all sometimes at a snails pace, but I'll manage.
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Old 16-01-2007, 06:06 AM
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I think I'm addicted to the internet, definitely. I have been long before I came to this forum. It's one of the things I do to pass time, since I have no friends and try to avoid going out as much as possible. Maybe it's my drug of choice, since I don't do other recreational drugs or alcohol. I never noticed it as being a problem until my family came here and pointed it out to me. They routinely tell me to get off the computer, and I listen to them, but ofttimes once they are gone or sleeping or whatever I will sneak back on. It really hit home to me that it was a SERIOUS problem at one point last week, when we lost internet service for 2 days because of a storm. I couldn't sleep, I couldn't eat, I was extremely cranky... I just kept checking the computer to see if the internet was back on yet. It was really horrible. Brian observed me during this, told my aunt and uncle, and now they are on my case even moreso. I'm supposed to talk to my psychiatrist about it this week when I see him.

Not an excuse, but one of the problems with me is, lately I will get very physically ill in the middle of the night, and need to sit up straight, can't lie down, and so the computer is good for distracting me in that case. And I do get a lot of support from the people here. There needs to be a balance, moderation, etc, and I haven't quite figured that out yet for myself, but I'm sure my family will help me, my uncle being in AA I'm sure will try to get me to do the 12 steps. I am definitely going to work on it, as I understand it makes working on my PTSD issues harder, and I don't want that.
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