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Go Back   PTSD Forum > Break The Ice > Chat - PTSD

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  #11  
Old 20-02-2007, 12:58 AM
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becvan becvan is offline Gender Female
 
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LOL okay Mac, misunderstanding understood!

funny guy! lmao

bec
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  #12  
Old 20-02-2007, 05:31 AM
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I might be a bit different here by thinking this, but I do think that there will be a day when the word PTSD won't even come into thinking when having a bad or good day. You're just having a good day because of something and having a bad day because of this...but not because of PTSD. This is where the "Is ptsd curable" topic starts to make me wonder. I think I've figured it out. PTSD is NOT curable in the fact that I have changed my life in order to adapt with life with PTSD. Kind of like a disability that can be lived with. But at the same time, when I have a bad day, it's not because of PTSD, or when I'm having a good day it's not in spite of PTSD. Does that make sense?

I truly believe that I'm a better person post trauma than before. Everyone is affected by life experiences and what we learn about life and ourselves through suffering can make us better people.
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  #13  
Old 20-02-2007, 11:19 AM
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I had someone tell me that one of the good things about falling apart is that you get to put yourself back together the way you want. Leaving parts of myself behind that I don't particularly like, keeping the parts that I do and learning new things about myself has been an experience in and of itself.

I'm getting to the point where I can see that good days/bad days are just that. I know I still have a ways to go and sometimes I have rough days with lots of symptoms, but these are getting fewer and farther apart. The good days are when I see me. Not the 'pre-PTSD' me...but the real me that's been emerging through the layers. Acceptance of all of me (good and not so good) has been one of the best gifts I've ever given myself.

Great post, Bec!
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  #14  
Old 20-02-2007, 11:53 AM
 
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Yes Mac I tend to agree with your comment "If we could go back"and change that event or events that changed our lives wouldnt it be great.Porky Rees

Last edited by porkyrees; 20-02-2007 at 11:54 AM. Reason: spelling mistake
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  #15  
Old 21-02-2007, 10:21 AM
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To be honest, I don't really remember what I was like before...

Everything began when I was 11...at least that's when it consciously began for me. I think it may have been there for much longer but erupted when I was 11. Thinking back, I think that's when my PTSD really started, but I was still afraid to tell anyone about the abuse, so I was "depressed" instead.

From there, the traumas that ocurred during my adolescence piled on (as well as constantly trying to off myself), and I went untreated for the whole shebang, just treated for depression (and because of my mother counselling, no meds). I can't go back because I hardly remember what I like as a kid. I remember some things, but even those I look at through the fog of my current condition.

With the help of my older sisters, I have been able to piece together my personality as a kid vs my personality now to find those traits that survived: I'm still a giver (gave away my toys or food or whatever I had if I saw someone who needed it), I'm still a helper (liked being responsible), I'm still very quiet, I still love music or anything artistic, I'm still a loner, I still love to read, I'm still very sensitive to my environment, I still cry easily (only back then I didn't care who saw; I'm a hell of a lot more circumspect about crying now), I still love animals and nature.

A good day is that; good...and rare for me these days.

Last edited by No-Twitch-Tabitha; 21-02-2007 at 10:28 AM. Reason: Just thought of another point.
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