umm.. who is taking your stuff.. and why?

bec

I have my period now. Those are the worst times. Because of these hormones added to the already mixed up hormones and neurotransmitters in my brain it gets totally out of control.
The only positive thing about this is that it is not a sign of having a set back or going down the drain finally, but that I can explain it rationally and get over it.
In the beginning it was even worse with all the hormones because of "that" on top of everything. The psychiatrist told me I had to stop with the milk because it made me insane. But I thought she would come back, and that was the only thing that kept me alive then. I used a pump for the milk up to 3 months. Clinging on to it. Useless, the government said that mother milk was the worst milk for her and that it was child abuse and only for black people.
After 2 years or so my hormones came to rest. Now every month it comes back and reminds me of everything.
The tears of a crying womb, some ancient Greek philosopher called it once, hence the name hysteria for womb. Hippocrates? Probably.
I probably have PMS, we shall see because beside DES-NOS, PMS will also be added to the DSM V I have red somewhere.
Because of the hormones, the PMS, the PTSD the government said I was crazy and dangerous. Because of my behavior not because of these consequences of what they did to me because they say it is the other way around. I was crazy and dangerous which was obvious because of these symptoms that were part of my pre existing psychiatric disorder and thus not a result of the torture.
Only the first judge told the psychiatrists (mind you!! the judge has to explain to a doctor!?) that I was normal and these were mood swings because of my hormones.

Ok... I have ear marked this one for tomorrow... now your in for it Maus. No more bullshit with this theory of yours, being your too far gone nonsense, its time to provoke your brain and get you motivated and thinking more logically about yourself.

Maus, I have an interesting question here, simple really at first; being why are you avoiding becs questions? Who is doing all these things to you? Why would anyone come and take your furniture? If they are taking your furniture, then why are you still online? If they wanted to go through all this trouble, wouldn't they cut your phone from contacting others, ie. the WWW, etc?

Oh, and this jumped right out at me Maus from your initial statement:
After our live chat discussion, just starting to push you a little and it got too much, seems to me that you don't want to be helped, you just want to hinder as many others as possible. Have you merely forgotten what life is about, and instead become spiteful towards anyone who tries to even help you, or towards yourself to actually help yourself. I don't care if your a physician, that doesn't mean you know everything about mental health, and I can see you being very hard to help for this very reason... you think because you have failed to help yourself or be helped thus far, that it's impossible.

You said to me in live chat that you have given up on yourself, and trying to help others. Things I see here from you are not really just help, but a lot of your own spitefulness coming through, ie. talking constantly to people about someone violating their human rights or the like, because of what has occurred to yourself. You are now pushing your hurt upon others as I see it, not really helping others, but exactly your statement, dragging everyone down with you, more than maybe even you think you are.

Food for thought maybe maus?

it is in the messages I posted the answers to your questions (becs and yours). I made a list of what the first ones are going to take away. This should have happpened 15-1 and is now scheduled voor 20-4. But the others are coming also (6 agencies or so in total) it is a long story.
They started with the kitchen and the living room. So thank god I have my pc for a few more weeks I hope. It is brand new and my life line and my contact with the lawyers. The date for the pc en bed etc. is not clear yet. I only have the letter that they are coming. After that they are going to block my bank account and then I don't have a phone, ADSL etc. then it is goodbey to you all.
So if you don't hear from me say in a week or so then you know I can't be on the WWW anymore.

thank you for your kind words and help?

(((((maus))))))

Hope all is well. My prayers are with you.

Love & Care
Marilyn

Maus, why exactly would they take all your stuff away? You must owe someone something for them to repossess all your furniture. No country, even the Netherlands, are that backward with their laws of ownership. Hell, Russias not even that bad. What have you done Maus, being more to the point. Nobody just comes and takes your furniture for no reason. You have done something wrong somewhere for them to do that.

some good news, I hope
There's an institute called the safety board, they investigate disasters or near accidents involving individuals, groups, industries etc.
Since 2002 the european court wants status rapports of every country about the human rights. This safety board is an independent (from the government) organization that makes those rapports also.
Because of their investigation last year of the death of several innocent people who were in the care of the government the minister of justice and other ministers had to resign. This made the minister of justice furious because he and his whole family before him had been in power for at least 70 years and also in the european court.
Why did this happen? Because the director of the safety board is the prince :-) yes! the son in law of the queen. He isn't really a prince, thanks to the same family who controlled the justice department for decades (they didn't allow him to wear the title prince) therefore he can have a public position in our society. Pay back ;-)
Going against the son in law of the queen is even for the minister too much to handle.
Now this man wrote me a letter that he wants to talk to me about what happened. I wonder if he is going to start an investigation or not. He started to investigate a few dozen deaths of children who were in care of the government. So I don't know if he will use this case in his rapport or not or something else or do nothing. I don't know. I really didn't expect to hear from him at all.
Saved by a prince :-) not on a white horse though
I'm not a supporter of the royal family but I'll make an exception in this case:
Long live the Queen!!