I was asked a simple question here and it has brought back some very painfull memories. That frankly I am not ready to deal with yet, so I have decided to leave.

I think right now, because I am way beyond anger, and I may lash out at someone and say something hurtfull even though I wont mean it.

I dont know when I'll be back or even if I will be back. If I decide to leave for good I'll contact a MOD and make them aware of such.

*stalks away, back into the shadows*

Mayhem, you will see a lot of people going through the anger. That is normal and needed and it is OK. It is hard but it is fine if you need a break. We all need a break and try not to take too much of this forum in in the beginning. Here is a link to another thread outlining that. Hope you feel better soon.

Reading Forum Increases Symptoms!

Mayhem,
In your post I have noted you are aware your anger may result in you lashing out at someone, and I must let you know that I am impressed that even though you have been badly triggered, you do not wish anyone harm.
I wonder if pehaps you should take comfort in this fact? As a veteran I know you are perfectly aware of the damage you can cause if you wished to when your anger takes over. This makes a veteran all so very aware of their anger, and rightly so. Looking at this from a completely different view point, I am seeing not your anger, but your ability to communicate your need effectively. I recognise and commend your effort!. Have you stopped to take note yourself? It is something to be proud of!
Time out is a great way to rest your mind until you choose to interact again. All of us here are fully aware of the pressure that comes from within, and want you to feel free to join in whenever you wish to.
I wish you well and look forward to seeing you post again if you feel able to.
Be proud in the fact you are now a soldier of PTSD, and sometimes you may lose a battle, but with your caring attitude, you are well on your way to winning the war.
Ryair xxxxxx