Actually, the word I left out was boat, but oh well.

So he came up. By himself. Things went really well. I tried kneeboarding, only because he wanted me too. So a plus for me for taking an interest in something he enjoys! Everything was great until it came time to say goodbye. He gave me this awkward hugs. You know, the kind you give people you barely know where you barely touch them...
So I made him do it again. It was much better and he kissed me on the cheek. He called when he got home and we talked about the day. He said he had a good time and when I asked where our relationship was going, he said he didn't know. Not in a bad way though. He told his mom I seemed more grown up since our break-up. I wasn't nagging him, or starting arguments, things like that. He likes this me, the person I was when we first met. Maybe he feels like he's missed out on things with his friends. Maybe that's why he's pushing me away (combined with the PTSD...his appointment for evaluation is October 12!)

I forgot to mention that this past weekend me and my best friend went into the city to visit Sean's sister. We went to some clubs and some bars and Sean text me the whole night and ended up calling me several times. In one of his texts he said he wished I were there with him. During our last conversation I told him I loved him and I hoped he had fun with his friends. He said ok and I told him in a cheery voice that I'd talk to him later. About 2 minutes later I got a call from him and all he wanted to say was that he loved me too. I was shocked. And excited. But I don't want to be like that. I don't want to be excited because I don't want to set myself up again. Is it ok for me to be like that? I just don't want to get hurt. Everyone tells me that they don't doubt he loves me, but I don't know that for sure and I just don't want to think he does if he doesn't still. I'm just rambling on...long day at work. Maybe things are looking up?

To be honest tiffany, if you had been nagging and arguing with him a great deal, and he does have PTSD, that is a recipe for disaster and he would likely be pulling away from you as a result. Many with PTSD simply cannot take much conflict and criticism. Remember that a person with PTSD is already in a pretty much constant state of stress, so any added stress, especially of the negative kind, is only going to make things worse for them. So they will tend to avoid anything, or anyone, who adds to that stress. Have you read Anthony's article about the PTSD cup? It explains things rather well:

The PTSD Cup Explanation

Well done though on your change of attitude towards him. It seems to be working a bit? I hope it continues! I certainly do hope things work out well, for both your sakes. Best to keep the lines of communication open. Hopefully things will be much clearer for you both after the assessment.

hi Tiffany,
My name is Tammy and I feel the need to tell you that I was very much in the same boat as you and to a certain degree I still am. I am 22 and my partner Alex is 26 and suffers from PTSD. PTSD is IMO a demon- sometimes they hide but they are always there kind of thing. A background to my relationship (sounds scarily similar to yours actually however it does have very different elements). I met and started dating Alex almost two and a half years ago no. I was pregnant to another man (obviously) and Alex had just been diagnosed with PTSD. About 3 months after we started dating we attended the PTSD Unit of the Mater Hospital where I learnt a lot about PTSD- some from lecturers but mostly from the other partners. I won't lie to you I was terrified! Knowing that there is nothing you can do to help or gauge the situation, especially in the beginning of a relationship, is really scary. But as I said we have been together for about two and a half years now and we are happy. He still has off days but we work through it together. I hope that the appt on the 12th October goes well and if he does have PTSD that he gets all the help he can. Also if he is willing to include you and is sent ot the PTSD program, I highly recommend that you attend. It is a lot easier to learn how to deal with this sort of illness at the beginning rather than knowing your husband for years as one person and then having him change (my personal opinion). Anyway I hope al goes well for you both, Tammy.