Donate for PTSD
Donate - PTSD Forum is quite costly to run, maintain and improve. All donations are appreciated.
New To PTSD Forum
FAQ's - All you need to know contained in Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ).
PTSD Forum Extra's
PTSD Forms - PTSD Forum provide a PTSD assessment and self analysis form.

PTSD Learning - Contains some PTSD learning information and presentations.
Recommendation
Firefox Browser PTSD Forum recommends the use of Firefox Browser with Search Status add-on, plus your countries relevant English dictionary add-on. This enables forum members to spell check and remove typical toolbars from their browser.

Go Back   PTSD Forum > Break The Ice > Chat - PTSD
I Just Can't Do It! I Feel So Guilty!!!! I Just Can't Do It! I Feel So Guilty!!!!
Register Blogs FAQ Members List Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Notices

Welcome to PTSD Forum. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is a life threatening, debilitating disorder that can break down a sufferer’s body through anxiety and stress. Further it poses a significant suicide risk resulting from the brains neurological imbalance and chemical depression. Sufferers often live in denial, thus this community is aimed at helping PTSD sufferers help themselves through others experiences, guidance and education. We are here for the sufferer, spouse and families surrounding PTSD. Spouses and family are too often forgotten in this equation, and often they receive all the worst that PTSD has to offer. If you're involved in any way with PTSD, get registered and help yourself now.

Non-active members will eventually be deleted. If you are not a sufferer, carer or someone within the mental health industry, and active, then there is little reason for you to be a member of this forum. Non-active members with zero posts are deleted periodically during the year.

Reply
Page 2 of 3 < 1 2 3 >
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #11  
Old 27-10-2007, 07:13 AM
She Cat's Avatar
She Cat She Cat is offline Gender Female
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Ma
Posts: 3,088
She Cat has much to be proud ofShe Cat has much to be proud ofShe Cat has much to be proud ofShe Cat has much to be proud ofShe Cat has much to be proud ofShe Cat has much to be proud ofShe Cat has much to be proud ofShe Cat has much to be proud of
Default
Oh Pand,

I am so sorry that this has happened hon.......Bec is right. This isn't about you, it's his lack of being able to handle his own crap, and your PTSD is very convenient right now to use as an excuse. Hell it's only been what maybe 2 months???? Did he expect miracles to happen???? Or did he think that him being in your life, would just cure your PTSD and you both could live happily ever after????

Hang in there hon.....Keep your head up, and don't let him know that it bothers you one little bit......

You deserve way better than this....

Hugs,

Wen
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old 27-10-2007, 07:20 AM
veiled's Avatar
veiled veiled is offline Gender Female
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: U.S.A. Kansas
Posts: 3,540
Blog Entries: 1
veiled is a splendid one to beholdveiled is a splendid one to beholdveiled is a splendid one to beholdveiled is a splendid one to beholdveiled is a splendid one to beholdveiled is a splendid one to behold
Default
All I can do is echo Bec and Wendy. This was an easy excuse to use. He has his own issues I think and they are not you! Just remember that.
Reply With Quote
  #13  
Old 27-10-2007, 08:58 AM
pandora's Avatar
pandora pandora is offline Gender Female
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Ontario
Posts: 1,919
pandora is a name known to allpandora is a name known to allpandora is a name known to allpandora is a name known to allpandora is a name known to allpandora is a name known to all
Default
Thanks guys....I am trying to process this but it is still really hard. I know my issues are troublesome but he has been so nice to me and again it was totally unexpected. It just hurts right now. I cannot beleive that I trusted enough to let someone in and I thought everything was OK....i know he is grieing the loss of his brother but he went from "I want you in my life" to "you are not ready to be in a relationship" it is hard to trust already and this just made me feel so broken.
Reply With Quote
  #14  
Old 27-10-2007, 09:04 AM
Damiea's Avatar
Damiea Damiea is offline Gender Female
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Vermont
Posts: 304
Damiea is on a distinguished road
Default
I have to echo what everyone is telling you.. I think the death of a close family member causes so very much emotional upheavel that things tend to overwhelm you. He could very possibly be just as scared and upset as you.. he's hurting so very much and lots of people need to greeve in private.. alone. And maybe he did want you to some how fix things and make him feel all better.. but thats not really possible with anyone! I would say.. look at it all as what a huge step you personally took in trying something new! Does it matter that this one time it didn't work out? what matters is you tried! and that is a huge personal step you took!
Reply With Quote
  #15  
Old 28-10-2007, 04:37 AM
becvan's Avatar
becvan becvan is offline Gender Female
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: T. Bay, Ontario Canada
Posts: 3,231
Blog Entries: 7
becvan is a splendid one to beholdbecvan is a splendid one to beholdbecvan is a splendid one to beholdbecvan is a splendid one to beholdbecvan is a splendid one to beholdbecvan is a splendid one to beholdbecvan is a splendid one to beholdbecvan is a splendid one to behold
Default
The part that sucks about his Pand, is that when we open ourselves to another we risk getting hurt. There is nothing we can do about that.

Realize that just because this relationship ended, does not mean that it's because your broken or unworthy. Maybe he was unworthy of you! Plus, people end relationships all the time for various reasons. Chances are your PTSD has had little to do with it!

I know how painful this is, but don't slam the door on dating and men just yet. I'm single but willing to try dating if the right type of man comes along. Trust is something others must earn from me. I see no difference in this for dating. They must earn it by being consistent, caring and capable.

I'm in the same boat as you.. we can work on this together!

So how you doing today?

bec
Reply With Quote
  #16  
Old 28-10-2007, 11:09 AM
kers's Avatar
kers kers is offline Gender Female
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 1,009
kers is a splendid one to beholdkers is a splendid one to beholdkers is a splendid one to beholdkers is a splendid one to beholdkers is a splendid one to beholdkers is a splendid one to behold
Default
Oh, Pandora. I'm sorry it didn't work out. But I'm so, so glad that you made the jump to try. That took a lot of bravery. And it made you so happy for a while--it was nice to see.
Reply With Quote
  #17  
Old 29-10-2007, 03:16 AM
vst vst is offline Gender Female
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 88
vst is on a distinguished road
Default
Pandora,

I agree with all that has been said. Putting your trust in someone is very hard for us with PTSD. This past year a friendship was lost because of my PTSD. This man had been kind and good friend and to this day I am not sure exactly what happened. My feelings of friendship ended when he belittled me for my emotional baggage, even though he came with plenty himself. Now that the trust is gone, he is a trigger. For a while whenever I saw a car like his I became nauseated, but that is getting better. We sometimes run into each other because we have the same friends and each time I see him I get nauseous, but I am not losing the good friends I have over a stupid man. The good news was one day I realized that even though he had broken my trust I could trust again.

Just wanted to let you know you are not alone. We are all in this together.

Hugs,

vst
Reply With Quote
  #18  
Old 29-10-2007, 07:04 AM
Portabella's Avatar
Portabella Portabella is offline Gender Female
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: High Plains, Colorado
Posts: 450
Portabella is on a distinguished road
Default
I agree with Bec on this one, he needs space evidently due to his loss and his inability to deal with it. You are not "broken" I hate that expression. We are only as broken as we allow ourselves to believe we are.....I have a bit of rust, maybe a bit more wear than others my age, but I am unique and I earned it as did you ......((((Hugs)))))
Reply With Quote
  #19  
Old 30-10-2007, 05:58 AM
pandora's Avatar
pandora pandora is offline Gender Female
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Ontario
Posts: 1,919
pandora is a name known to allpandora is a name known to allpandora is a name known to allpandora is a name known to allpandora is a name known to allpandora is a name known to all
Default
Thank You everyone......

Had an appt with my therapist but unfortunately...this was a bad visit in that i could not concentrate. I just kept hearing counting and the words...breathe, just breathe...over and over in my head. I just feel saddened and almost tricked. Like really he just said "I want you in my life' and then 5 days later....l"you are not ready to be in a relationship. AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH This just makes me want to hate men more. Now.....I don't want to trust again. i know i have been through a lot worse and i can handle alot but i feel mixed up, confused and sad today. I just want to be loved that is just the bottom line. I am having a very bad poor me day....sorry!!!
Reply With Quote
  #20  
Old 30-10-2007, 08:59 AM
She Cat's Avatar
She Cat She Cat is offline Gender Female
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Ma
Posts: 3,088
She Cat has much to be proud ofShe Cat has much to be proud ofShe Cat has much to be proud ofShe Cat has much to be proud ofShe Cat has much to be proud ofShe Cat has much to be proud ofShe Cat has much to be proud ofShe Cat has much to be proud of
Default
You will find love, and you are loved. Your son loves you, we love you, and now you need to learn to love yourself.

Love comes from within Pandora..... Love yourself and it will shine through you......You can have anything you want if you could only learn to love yourself......We all need to learn to do this.
Reply With Quote
Reply
Page 2 of 3 < 1 2 3 >

Bookmarks

« Psych Wants Me on Remeron. What Are Your Thoughts? | UGH Feeling So Sorry for Myself! »
Thread Tools
Display Modes
Linear Mode Linear Mode

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off

Home - Archive - Privacy Statement - Top