I have a friend that I believe has borderline personality disorder and completely freaked out that I made plans for the holidays with my family when I supposedly had plans with her. As I pointed out, her and I never even discussed what day we were to meet, but she says that isn t true and we had a plan. She now says I won t own up to changing my plans and I am in such a rage that she is provoking me. She always does this with her x and leaves him long winded messages taking up all the space on his machine. She does the same with me and now she is leaving me long e mails that I don t want to read because they just get me so enraged. I don t know if this is detrimental to my PTSD and I don t know if it is a good ides to keep communicating with her

If you really do believe that she has BPD I suggest that you read the book, Stop Walking on Eggshells." It will allow you to stop feeling so enraged with her issues. It's an excellent book.

Sorry to take over this thread...but thanx che cat....I think I will look for that book too. That is my mother...that is how I refer to when I was a teenager and until now....walking on eggshells with my mother.

dshanks.....in dealing with a person like this.....if they do not acknowledge this and sometimes even if they do...there seems to be no way to win...it is their way or no way. I am sure this is detrimental to your PTSD...we are already on high alert. Again...not talking to my own mother...I have to do it....to keep my sanity...if that is what this is...
Take Care

Yes it is walking on eggshells and it is amazing how this person can t let go of the fact that she is right. It is extremely frustrating but hard to say good by since I have known her for over 15yrs. Thanks for your support

Your welcome...take care!

Yes...hollerdays. That is what I remember from when I was younger. All the preparation my mother would do only to ruin it on xmas night. I always have a hard time at this time of the year and not when I am in the middle of the panic and craziness...no, always on New Year s day. I seem to have this idea in my head that it is supposed to be a magical time and instead I have flashbacks and memories of drunken fights and chaos. I just wish it would come to an end in a normal way...not like some hangover. And on top of all the memories I have this friend who I am certain has Borderline. She just had to make things worse. I don t even know if I will ever be able to talk to her without blowing up on her and telling her it is her fault that I feel so totally engulfed in rage.I really don t know what to do. I feel a crisis is coming on and I don t know if I have the strength to keep it from taking over me.I really feel it coming and I don t know what to do. My shrink is also on vacation until next week and I resent him for picking such a bad time even though he really deserves a vacation from his patients.

I know it's hard, especially at the holidays, but try and remember a few things. You are sick, alcoholism is a sickness and so isn't borderline.

It may have been very stressful time for your mother too when you were growing up.

I wonder if you are mad at your friend or if her behavior just reminds you of past events. Rage dosen't just happen, it is a reaction to other things that build up to rage. There are other emotions that you need to have first in order to get to the rage.

Anthony has an explanation on the forum somewhere of how this works.

Thanx She Cat. You hit the nail on the head. My rage is not coming from nowhere and I am working on it in therapy, but one thing is for sure, the holidays are stressful.