Hi everyone, it's not a good day for me and my husband today. Our friend went to have some of his colon removed last Friday. We went to see him Sunday and he looked really good. We got a call today he stopped breathing for 12 minutes and they had to trak him. It doesn't look good docs say 48 hours will tell if he is brain dead. This man and his wife is all we had left of people who didn't judge us or look down on us. They accepted us for who we are. These are our only true friends left. Pray for him that he makes it through. Just when I was starting to feel better. I am soo down. Sick to my stomach and the brain is getting foggy. I can see the traits of PTSD taking affect. I'm numb, spacey
sunnydaze

I'm sorry to hear that sunnydaze, I hope whatever happens you find more friends. There are people out there that won't judge you. I think you just have to keep looking. In any case I will say a prayer for you.

Tammy

If you can,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,it might be hard, when saddened, can you imagine the times he cracked you up, the times where he was so important in a situation, etc, and then feel joy that you are lucky to have those memories, that part of him will always remain in you, and try to end on what might seem impossible, a happy note, when the gloomy thoughts enter.
I have less then two years worth of memories of my dad, he died when I was 15, not his fault for not being around (mother's), but that I cherish each and every memory I have of him, and because he was in my life, I am so much a better person toward the world, as well as my brother, who passed when he was 35, he was my rock, and always will be.
No one can ever fill my father's shoe, nor my brother's. I thank God I had such beautiful real simple gentlemen in my life.
I feel for you, any loss is painful, I too, am going thru a burial right now.
Don't know your beliefs, but there is a saying " Let go, and let God" , meaning give to him your weakness and your burdens, so he can return you his strength, it doesn't always work for me, but when it does, ahhhhhhhhhhh.
I have you and yours in my prayers.
Donna-Lynne

Thanks so much for the encourging words. I am sad that you to are having to deal with a death right now also. You seem to be a positive person just what I need to learn. I need to work on this big time. Whenever something tragic happens, I get real down for months. Besides PTSD, my doc says I have depersonalization. When I get down I revert to being a little girl crying as I did so much of. I had no one to comfort me as a child. My mother would say "there she goes again, she's just an emotional child". With the abuse I went through , I wonder why! I too will pray for you. I got back into religion after my step-son was murdered. It helps alot. It has helped me from thinking of wanting to die. I was told if you can't pray read the book of Psalms, they are all songs of praise to God. wISH YOU THE BEST.
sunnydaze

Thank you for your thoughts. This forum is just what I needed. I hope it helps you also
sunnydaze

To God, our lives here is just a sneeze. For us it may seem like an eternity, but for him our entire lives, if long lived, is but seconds.
Make your seconds count with a lot of laughter, (many comedy sites and emails), to counter balance the sadness we all go through.
My friend's life down here made a difference to so many, I cherish the thought that I was lucky enough to have had his happy go lucky spirit in mine, inspiring me to do the same.
Yes loss hurts, no doubt, but who would we really be without those special people we deem lovable? Maybe not as good as we would hope.
Love the memories of all goodness you've had in your life, we have enough time to dabble in the bad when flashbacks force us there.
Be strong, hun, I know it is tough, very tough, but you will hopefully recount all the goodness that has rubbed off of him and onto you.
Much sincerity,
Donna-Lynne

I've gone to two funerals recently, one was a suicide and one was lung cancer. It was very sad for us, but I got through it and you can too. I know it's hard to lose friends but I think you can do it! :) There will be other people who won't judge you so try not to lose hope!

Well the friend is having a catscan done today to see how much brain activity is left. I'm praying for the best not only for my husband and I but for his family who loves him so dearly. Death is a hard thing to accept. Sometimes we feel like we don't want to go on than when something tragic happens like this you feel so bad for the family and friends who will miss them. The man went in for partial colon removed as preventive measure from possibly turning into cancer. Docs won't tell family much of anything. Wonder what really happened? He was doing well 2 days after surgery when we went to see him. He was laughing, telling jokes and sitting up and hoping to go home in 2 days than BOOM! I have my 2 different T appoinments next week am looking forward to going before I get so down that I won't be able to bring myself up again for months. At least with being diagnosised with PTSD one can start understanding themselves for the reactions to expect.
Thanks again for the support.
sunnydaze

Well friends they pulled the plug on mine and my husbands friend on Thursday. He is breathing through the trek and the family requested a do not recesatate. So, he lays alone in his hospital bed with no brain activity until he expires. It is so sad to think of him all alone, his family said their goodbyes on Thursday never to return again. He is considered legally dead but continues to breathe in air. I am so confused as how to feel.
I went from having insomnia to sleeping much longer now. I can't wait to see my T on Thursday to sort my feelings out. Our dog even has been affected my our depression. I never knew that they could sense our feelings till I read a vets report. I would never want to be put in the position of making the call to unplug for anyone. I have never experienced this ever and it doesn't feel good to be on the waiting end of this terrbile tragedy. Does one wish the death that is inevitable to happen quickly so one can get on to the acceptance stage and start the healing process or hope by a minut chance his brain activity is better than the tests and he opens his eyes and cusses at all those who gave up on him. The docs definitely messed up on this man big time.
I am sooo down feeling bad for everyone involved on this. My husband was diagnosised with P.T.S.D. when his only child(son) was murdered now to lose his best and only friend. I am worried about myself but much more for him so I think I am covering up the pain that I am going through to be strong for him. I doubt it's working but I will try for his sake.
sunnydaze

My friend died yesterday morning. We are devastated along with his family. He will surely be missed. The hospital is denying any wrong doing as usual. How does one go in for simple surgery start to get well and next is in drug induced coma after the hospital took 12 minutes to recessitate him. I will think twice of getting anything done at that hospital. To top it off it is a very well-known one. It doesn't mean anything when they slip up like this. Pray for all to stay well. Going to my T today hope it helps my depression.
sunnydaze