I've never been very good at starting a conversation, so bear with me on this.

I don't have any knowledge of PTSD. I always thought I was suffering from the beginning stages of alzheimers or was getting ADD. Shows what I know, huh?

I was diagnosed as manic depressive 20+ years ago and once out of the hospital, abandoned it. It was the worst experience of my life, I was treated like the scum of the earth by medical professionals, not allowed a voice in my treatment and was "watched" if I dared suggest I didn't like the side effects of whatever medications I was being given. I wasn't told what the medications were, what possible side effects they had and was flying blind. I didn't know I had the right to be treated humanely. And I was there by choice. I won't make that mistake again.

Can someone please tell me why it's not OK to be a homebody? It's called self-isolation, but I think that's so unfair. I have physical limitations, a respiratory disease and bad back and cannot go frolicking about like I used to. I like to garden, cook, make soap and I like to feed and watch hummingbirds, play with my dogs and chat online. I don't understand why that's viewed as a visible trait of mental illness. Can someone enlighten me?

Hi, and welcome. Have you been diagnosed with PTSD?

JustJane,
Welcome to the forum. I too rather stay at home. I have zero tolerance to the ignorance of people. I thought I wanted to get out more however, that is causing me distress. People see me different than they are or I see myself different that they. I don't have any tolerance answering the phone. Telemarket callers can't seem to take no for an answer. They call back! I kindly tell them no thanks than hang up the phone. I feel so alone but when I go out I can't take the unkindness that people display on the road at stores ect. Everyone seems to want to be first at everything. I try to help people out and they take try to take advantage of me. I have set more boundaries to letting people know how I feel so that brings me back to being all alone again.
Whatever! Hope you find the help you need.
sunnydaze

Hi Sunnydaze, I found the phone to be the easy part. I have a phone in my home for one reason: I need one. I need to be able to call an ambulance or the police if I have an emergency. I need a phone line to connect to the internet. It had nothing to do with giving others the opportunity to call me at their convenience.

First, I set the number of rings to 4. After the fourth ring, the caller is sent to my voicemail. It's not something that I can hear unless I dial into the call center and retrieve my messages. The phone will give me some beeps instead of a dialtone to let me know whether or not anyone called and left a message.

Second, I turned the volume of the ringer as low as it will go so it is really barely audible. I don't need the ringer up loud since it is there for my use for outgoing calls.

Third, I have only one phone and it is not in my bedroom. It's by the computer in the living room.

Try these. When a phone causes you too much anguish, but you need it for your own welfare as I do, it's time to turn the ringer down. It's your home and a phone can be an invasion of your privacy just as well as a stalker or door-to-door salesman. I understand.

Hi JustJane and welcome to the forum.

Tammy

Hi, JustJane...

Being a homebody...why not! This busy-mad culture we live in demands that we all but abandon our homes and loved ones for the allmighty buck / brass ring / corporate power ... whatever. The home is the hearth...the center of our little universes. Our sanctuary.

You have health concerns which limit your ability to be hugely active "out there." You list some pleasures of being home...they all sound delightful and restful.

Being a homebody and isolating the self are two very different things. Perhaps flip-sides of a coin? I, too, am a homebody...and I can also hole myself up and disappear! I have to balance my inwardness with the necessities of being in the world.

It's no surprise, too, that if we have been injured and abused by other people, we will want to retreat to a place of safety. I have to admit, too, that I want nothing to do with most of the human race most of the time! I just want my own small circle of folks with whom I can be myself.

The simple pleasures you write of are gentle...nourishing...steadying.

Another thought: being a homebody = being in relation ... self-isolating = cutting yourself off.

It's a gift...such a gift to have a home. A place that contains your soul. I consider my home, humble as it is, to be sacred. It's funny...'cause my home (which I share with my husband and our three cats) is a semi-mess; we're on the lower side of the income spectrum, and our furniture is a tad ratty (and cat-scratched!)...but everywhere there are pictures, sculptures, books, ... all are gifts and mean so much.

You go right ahead and be a homebody! To hell with anyone who calls that "mental illness"!

Best,

Roo

May I take that with me to my next "appointment?"

Nice comment Roo.
I agree completely. If you enjoy your own company, being home alone is a blessing and pleasures.
HOwever, if you stay in an get depressed and lonely, then it's probably not good.

Stand up for yourself with your therapist too!

Hi and welcome JustJane

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